Crybabies
by Misc.Frog
Summary: Stan is finally ready to break it off with Wendy for good. Kyle wants nothing more than to help his super best friend. Cartman is being nice to Kenny for some reason, and Craig and Clyde are being unusually silent. what's going on? -warning! Later smut, sexual situations, and the obvious foul language. Please fav and follow!
1. Stop Being Gay!

Bunch of Cry Babies.

RATED M: FOR OBVIOUS REASONS.

ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS SHOW- EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE-ARE ENTIRELY FICTIONAL. ALL VOICES ARE IMPERSONATED...POORLY. THE FOLLOWING PROGRAM CONTAINS COARSE LANGUAGE AND DUE TO ITS CONTENT SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE **_**

 **Les Claypool** : I'm goin' down the South Park, gonna have myself a time...

 **Kyle &Stan: **Friendly faces everywhere, humble folks without temptation!

 **Les Claypool:** I'm goin' down South Park, gonna leave my woes behind...

 **Cartman:** Ample parking day or night, people spouting : "HOWDY, NEIGHBOR!"...

 **Les Claypool:** I'm headin' down to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind...

 **Kenny:** I like girls with big big titties!

 **Les Claypool:** So come on down to South Park, and meet some friends of mine!

 **Chapter 1: Stop being gay!**

The students of South Park Elementary roamed the halls as they all left to their respected rides or buses. It was a friday, which meant an awesome weekend was ahead, and in the mean time, the South Park four walked to the exit.

"I'm just saying," Stan said. "That if Wendy really liked me, she'd put more effort in coming to see me, ya know?"

"Yeah, I think she just says you're her boyfriend to fill the emptiness in her life." Cartman joked.

"I hate to agree with Cartman, but he's kinda right." Kyle said begrudgingly. "Every time you try to kiss her, when you don't throw up first, she always changes the subject, like she doesn't want to kiss you or something." He said.

"Yeah, she's just been extra bitchy lately." Stan said.

"Definitely." Cartman snickered.

"I think it's time for **you** to break up with **her** this time." Kyle said. "Maybe then she'll take the hint that you don't want her around if she's just going to push you away like that." he said.

"I guess you're right." Stan said.

"Or you can just tell her to her face how you actually feel." Kenny mumbled through his hoodie, speaking for the first time today.

"Kenny, this is Wendy Testaburger we're dealing with here." Kyle said. "We gotta be super careful..."

"No Kenny's right..." Stan said. "She's just a person like any one of us, and besides, it's not like I don't have a reason to break up with her!"

"No, Stan-" Kyle interjected.

"No Kyle, I'm gonna go tell her to leave me alone for good, I'm done with her!" Stan then ran off, in his newfound confidence, forgetting about the bus.

"I give him till he gets to her house," Cartman said, messing with his phone. "Then he'll bitch out and give up."

"Do you even care about any of this?" Kyle asked the blob.

"Frankly no, Kahl." Cartman stated plainly. "I also love how the first thing to come out of Kinny's mouth ruined derailed the whole conversation." He giggled.

"Fuck you fatass!" Kenny mumbled.

"Fuck you too Kinny.." Cartman stated, not looking up from his phone.

"Well I better go stop him." Kyle said. Cartman stood with Kenny at the bus stop, awaiting the bus home.

"So Kinny..."

"What?" Kenny said, annoyed.

"I'm sorry." Cartman put his phone in his pocket. Kenny went silent. He was speechless, Cartman apologized?

"Who are you?" Kenny asked, genuinely concerned.

"What?" Cartman felt offended. "I can't legitimately apologize?" He asked.

"It's not that you aren't allowed to," Kenny mumbled. "It's just not something you do very often."

"I guess you're right." Cartman said. "Cuz Stan and Kahl are assholes. You and I relate, kinda..."

"How?" Kenny was confused.

"We both laugh at the same things that piss of Stan and Kahl." Cartman pointed out. Kenny nodded. "Not to mention, you practically live at my house now..." He said.

"Okay, I accept your apology." Kenny said. With that the bus pulled up. Cartman got on first, Kenny followed. They sat next to one another.

"So, my place?" Cartman suggested. Kenny nodded, looking ashamed of himself for going to Cartman's house nearly every day just to get a good meal. "It's okay Kinny, my mom doesn't care if you come over."

"It's not that." Kenny mumbled, turning toward the window, away from the blob.

"What is it Kinny?" Eric asked, almost as if he cared.

"Nothing..." Kenny mumbled.

"Fine, be that way." Cartman pulled his phone back out and began to do whatever he'd been doing all day...

Kyle chased Stan all the way to Wendy Testaburger's house. It was an especially freezing afternoon in South Park, and his lungs burned by the time they arrived. Stan was panting, and Kyle was wheezing.

"Why...the...fuck...did...you...run?" Kyle questioned with each deep gasp for air.

"I...don't...know..." Stan was also out of breath.

"C'mon...Let's go..." Kyle said. Stan glared at him.

"No... I'm gonna...do it..." Stan said sternly. He regained his breath. "I don't like her anymore, and she needs to know..."

"At least let me be your wingman..." Kyle said. Stan smiled. The two boys approached the door of the Testaburger household. Stan knocked, and Kyle took his place beside him. The door soon opened. It was Wendy, looking especially happy.

"Hey Stan!" She said, then noticed Kyle. "...and Kyle?"

"Wendy," Stan said, he gulped. "We need to talk."

"You guys better come in." She said, now conveying a look of fear. The two boys entered the house, and proceeded up to Wendy's room.

"Where are your parents?" Kyle asked.

"They're out on a date," Wendy said. "Like Stan and I should be." She said, hitting Kyle right in his nerve. Wendy pissed him off sometimes, and he could tell she didn't want him here.

"That's what I have to talk to you about." Stan said.

"I figured." She said, closing the door to her bedroom. The two boys were a little uncomfortable being alone with Wendy.

"Well, I don't like you anymore..." Stan stated, trying to remain calm for Wendy's sake.

"Why not Stan?" Wendy asked, appearing to be shocked that it was him asking the question.

"Cuz you don't love me..." Stan said. Wendy got a bit offended.

"IS SEX ALL YOU WANT STAN?!" She shouted. Stan panicked at his miswording of the statement.

"Shut up Wendy, you know what he meant!" It was Kyle who shouted now. "Don't pull your girly bullshit and make Stan look like the bad guy, It's **your** fault he wants to break up with you!"

"How is it **my** fault?" She ordered Stan to explain, instead Kyle took the floor.

"Because you push him away when he tries to show his affection, he just wants to love you, but every time he tries to kiss you, you dodge it, and change the subject!" Kyle said.

"And how do **you** know what **Stan** thinks?!" Wendy shouted.

"If you really knew him, you'd know that he isn't the most confident guy in the world, and you'd know that he's a lover, not a fighter, and you'd also know that every time you get mad at him, he cries, and apologizes over and over, but he can never bring himself to do it to your face!" Kyle shouted. Wendy was taken aback.

"Don't tell her about the phone calls..." Stan whispered.

"No," Kyle said, putting his hand on Stan's shoulder. "She needs to know."

"Know what?" She asked.

"You guys have broken up like six times. Every time you did, Stan would call me, and we'd be up till three in the morning, him crying and telling me he should just end it, and me trying my best to convince him to keep dating you, cuz I thought you two would work it out. Every. single. time..." Kyle said, as he remembered each tearful phone call. "It's really my fault.." Stan teared up now.

"Stan..." Wendy said. She approached Stan, who simply recoiled at her advancement.

"Get away from me." Stan said. He went to Kyle and hugged him. Kyle was caught off guard by this. "I'm sorry Kyle!"

"Stan?"

"No, I shouldn't have put you in those positions..." Stan teared up. Wendy watched the display of affection and giggled.

"So that's how it is huh?" Wendy said.

"What?" Kyle said.

"You two are a thing now?" She said, grinning. Stan was pissed now.

"FUCK YOU BITCH!" Stan screamed tearfully, before grabbing Kyle's hand and pulling him out of Wendy Testaburger's room, down the stairs, through the front door and into the freezing night...

"How was school Poopsy-kins?" Cartman's mom asked in her usual polite tone. Cartman entered the front door, with Kenny in tow. The poor boy brought with him a slight odor, one that Cartman had noticed on the bus, and even more so in the warm house. Eric's mom mustn't have noticed, that or she pretended not to.

"It was okay Mom, can Kinny and I have some cookies?" Cartman asked.

"Sure, I baked two dozen just like you asked." She said. Cartman didn't even thank her, just dragged Kenny to the kitchen. When they passed the threshold, Cartman let go of Kenny's gloved hand, and whaifed the odor from his nostrils.

"Kinny, whew!" Cartman said. "Sorry but you stink." He said. Kenny looked down at his feet. His jeans were filthy and ratty, and his orange parka was a few shades darker than it would've been clean. "Let's get you to the bath first." Cartman said, he then took Kenny's hand again, and dragged him up to the bathroom on the second floor.

The Cartman family's bathroom was all white, and nice an tidy. Kenny's dirty form contrasted with the white tiles and wallpaper.

"Okay Kinny, now when you take off your clothes, put them next to the door, and knock three times, then I will get them and get my mom to wash them." Cartman said. For usually being a dick, Kenny appreciated every bit of hospitality Cartman threw at him, and just nodded. The hooded boy began to remove his namesake. "Whoa, wait till I leave, gayboy." Cartman said. As soon as the door closed, Kenny stripped.

Cartman stood outside the bathroom door, as he heard the three knocks. The fat boy slowly opened the door and peeked his head in to locate the pile of clothes. He indeed found the clothes, but not before catching a glimpse of Kenny's naked ass. Cartman instinctively panicked, but couldn't look away, he watched the blonde boy's globes as he walked to the bathtub and tested the water. Then he climbed in the tub, and cartman could've sworn he saw Kenny's sack when he lifted his leg up.

Blushing furiously, Cartman snatched the bundle and gently closed the door. He rested against the door, breathing heavily, noticing the harndess in his pants. He sighed, as he carried the clothes to the laundry room. He saw his mother was just about to throw a load into the dryer.

"Mom, can you wash Kinny's clothes?" Eric asked. Mrs. Cartman grimaced at the smell, but nodded a yes. "Thanks mom." The fat boy then left her to the dirty work, before he headed to his room. When he approached the door, he heard heard something.

"I can't believe he still has this picture." Stan? Why was Stan in his room, and who was he talking to?

"He probably jerks off to it every night." Kyle. That fucking jew. Cartman then swung the door open, and sure enough, Kyle and Stan were sitting on his bed, holding the photo in question, but it was slightly edited, with Cartman's grinning face burnt off.

"What the fuck are you doing in my house?!" Cartman shouted.

"Dude calm down," Kyle said. "We aren't allowed to hang out?"

"Not when I didn't know you'd be here!" Cartman yelled. "Why are you here anyway, did Stan chicken out?"

"Actually he did it." Kyle said.

"No **you** did it, I just called her a bitch." Stan said.

"You called her a bitch? Sweet dude High five!" Cartman raised his hand in the air, Stan remained still. "Uh, high five bruh." Stan weakly slapped his palm against the fat boy's meaty hand.

"I told my mom that'd I'd be staying over here for the night." Stan said, not looking at Cartman, who was kind of angry now.

"WHAT!?"

"His parents ask him about Wendy every night at dinner, and Stan can't bring himself to tell them he broke up with her for good." Kyle said. Stan lowered his head down.

"Why not, is he gonna cry about it?" Cartman teased. Kyle looked at him with a glare that could melt ice. Cartman then gulped, realizing he was being especially douchey.

"For once, can you not be an asshole?" Stan asked politely. "Please?" Cartman felt terrible. He was just trying to be funny.

"Okay, Lemme go tell Kinn-" Cartman then saw Kenny, standing in the doorway, with a towel around his blonde mop, naked from the waist down.

Kenny, upon noticing he wasn't alone, jumped and cowered on the ground, crying out in utter embarrassment. Kyle and Stan were speechless, because this looked especially gay.

"Why is Kenny naked in your house?" Kyle asked.

"He was taking a bath, he smelt like a dead skunk, sorry Kinny," Cartman explained, going to his dresser, and pulling out a pair of green sweatpants that he kept for when Kenny stayed over. He stepped in front of the boy, blocking Stan and Kyle's view, but granting him one of his own. Kenny took the sweatpants, and made no effort to hide himself as he pulled them up and over his penis, making it slap against his belly as he stuffed it into the waistband. Cartman stepped away. Kenny's face was beet red, and he looked down at his feet. Cartman was also blushing, having just seen Kenny in all his glory, though it was unintentional. Or was it?

"Why did you have pants that fit him?" Kyle asked.

"They're old." Cartman made up an excuse.

"No no no, even when you were a little kid you were fatter than all of us, why do you have sweatpants in Kenny's size?" Kyle asked, not hatefully, but genuinely concerned. Cartman sighed.

"Kinnny has been coming over and taking baths here for about a month now." Cartman said. This was true. "It started cuz the school was going to suspend him because he stank so bad." he said.

"But why your house?" Kyle asked, still concerned.

"Cuz we get along I guess." Kenny said, speaking for the first time since he was seen in all his glory.

"Whatever, it's not important Kyle." Stan said.

"No it is, Cartman are you and Kenny...?" Kyle began to ask.

"Are we what, Kahl?" Cartman looked kind of pissed now.

"Are you two a thing?" Kyle asked finally. A look of utter shock appeared on Cartman's face, along with a shade of red.

"WHAT?!" Cartman shouted. "Oh, so I can't just be a good friend to Kinny?! Just cuz I care about him, means that I'm his butt buddy?!" He screamed.

"Cartman, calm down..." Kyle said. "I'm only asking because Stan and I..."

"Kyle don't..." Stan begged, grabbing Kyle's shoulders.

"We can't keep hiding now that Wendy is onto us!" Kyle shouted.

"Hiding what?" Cartman asked. Kyle looked down, sighing deeply, while stan covered his face with his gloved hands.

"Stan and I **are** a thing..." Kyle said, blushing a dark red. Stan did the same, but he hid behind Kyle's shoulder in utter embarrassment.

"Really?" Cartman was shocked.

"Go ahead and laugh asshole." Kyle said.

"No I'm not gonna laugh." Cartman said. Kyle looked up at the fat boy in utter confusion.

"Who are you?" Kyle asked. Cartman groaned in annoyance.

"Once again, am I not **allowed** to be nice to my friends!?" He said. Kyle glared, wid-eyed, at Cartman.

"It's just that, normally you'd laugh and call us fags for anything like this." Kyle said.

"I would normally, but this is real, it's gotta be. I've seen the way you two look at each other," Cartman said elegantly. "and if there's one thing Chef ever taught us, is to not fool around with love."

"Cartman..." Kyle teared up, remembering Chef and his wisdom in the ways of love. "I'm sorry..."

"What's there to be sorry about Kahl?" Cartman said, before he left the room. Kyle and Stan looked at each other in confusion, then at Kenny, who was still looking down at his feet.

"Are you okay Ken?" Kyle asked the blonde. Kenny nodded, without actually lifting his head. "Come sit." Kyle invited with a friendly tone. Kenny didn't move. "Kenny, c'mon, sit." Kyle almost ordered the blonde. Reluctantly, he did come sit with Kyle and Stan on Cartman's bed.

"How long have you guys been together?" Kenny asked. Kyle wasn't expecting that.

"Uhh..." Kyle counted on his fingers, which was irony at its finest. "Almost a month now." He said, blushing.

"Yeah," Stan said. "The last time **Wendy** dumped me, I went to Kyle's house, and we stayed up all night watching chick flicks..."

"Did you two bang?" Kenny asked in his usually vulgar way.

"What?!" Kyle gasped.

"Kenny!" Stan scolded.

"What, it's just a question." Kenny said.

"Oh, yea sorry, we're not used to hearing you speak fluently." Kyle deduced that Kenny always asked such blunt and vulgar questions, it was just strange actually being able to understand them. "To answer your question...no." Kyle blushed. Cartman then returned with a large bowl of chocolate chip cookies.

"As I was saying," Cartman said, putting the cookies in on a small table near his bed. "There's nothing for you guys to be sorry about. I've always been an asshole, and it's only natural for you to assume I'd just laugh at you guys bein' together." He said.

"Cartman..." Kyle sighed, still very confused at the fat boy's change of heart.

"Jew..." Cartman answered back, grinning.

"That's more like it." Kyle said, giggling. They all laughed as the night drew on further.

Soon the boys were all gathered around Cartman's television, playing four-player deathmatch on Call of Doody. Cartman was screen-cheating as usual, and the other three knew it, so they fought fire with fire.

"Hey fucker, you're screen-cheating!" Cartman yelled at Stan, who giggled, and headshot the fat boy's avatar. Just then Cartman's mom came in, holding a bundle of clothes.

"Kenny dear, here are your clothes," She said. Kenny got up and accepted the clothing, thanking her. "Now it's about time you boys went to bed, it's a school night."

"But mooooooooooom, I gotta snipe Stan to get back at him for screen cheating!" Cartman whined. His mother was rather resilient though.

"It's a school night! Tomorrow is Friday, and you can stay up all night then, but I want you boys in bed now." She said in a kind, yet ordering tone. Cartman sighed, and turned off the television, followed by the X-Box. The four boys got up as Cartman's mom left through the door.

"So where're we gonna sleep?" Kyle asked. Cartman was digging in his closet, ignoring the redhead. He pulled out a large box. He lugged said box over near his bed, and opened it, pulling out an air matress. He began to use the pump to inflate it, but soon got tired.

"God dammit Kinny you do it it's your bed!" He ordered. Kenny then ran over, and began to inflate the matress with the plunger. Within minutes, the matress was at full size. "You and Stan can sleep on my bed." Cartman said, between heavy breaths.

"Where are you gonna sleep?" Kyle asked, for once concerned for the fat boy.

"On the air matress..." Cartman's face grew slighly pink. "..with Kenny." The four stood in silence for a good minute.

"So...?" Stan was confused.

"NO, We're not a thing!" Cartman shouted. Kenny looked on, distant from the conversation. "I just don't wanna sleep on the floor, and this is Kinny's matress!"

"Okay okay... chill." Kyle said. "It's just weird that you're letting us sleep in **your** bed." he said.

"Just think of it as an apology for me being a dick earlier." Cartman said, looking away from the two boys, as he crawled onto the air matress. "C'mon Kinny." The blonde boy crawled into bed beside the larger boy. Stan and Kyle looked at each other, Kyle shrugging his shoulders. Stan did the same, as they both got in Cartman's rather comfy bed. He probably had one of those Tempur-pedic matresses. Kyle snuggled up with the blanket wrapped around his body, and he felt Stan spoon him. He accepted the other boy's embrace, and they slowly drifted asleep.


	2. You Bastard

Bunch of Cry Babies.

RATED M: FOR OBVIOUS REASONS.

 _Author's note-Nyum!: Hello! here-nyum! Just wanted to explain a few things. First of all, this is chapter 2 of Crybabies. Yes there will be nudity, mostly from a rather slutty Kenny, but not for long(wink)._

 _Don't like don't read, the usuall blah blah blah.-Nyum!_

 _Hope you enjoy-Nyum!_

 **Chapter 2: You Bastard**

Butters woke up in a daze. He barely got any sleep last night. His Dad had grounded him again, which meant no dinner for him, so the blonde boy was practically starved by this point. He made a point to hurry up and get ready for school. The sooner he was at school, the sooner he'd eat. As bad as it may have sounded, it was all Butters' fault for making that stupid face again. You know the one, when he had his picture taken as school. Yeah, that silly face.

"Butters!" It was his dad, who just entered the room.

"Y-yeah Dad?" The blonde stuttered, fearing a consecutive grounding.

"Are you ready for school?" His dad asked.

"Y-yes I am dad." He answered.

"Okay, now if I get another call from the school today, You will receieve double-grounding," He said. "Do you understand me mister?"

"Yes I-I understand sir." Butters said. Then his Dad left, closing the door behind him. Butters sighed, and slipped his backpack on, before heading out of his door, and off to school.

*

"Boys," Mrs. Cartman chimed. "It's time to wake up!" The four boys were lying in their respective beds. Kyle and Stan were still spooning, with Stan's cheek pressed against Kyle's bare back. Cartman was lying flat on his back, with Kenny draped along his wide body, still in nothing but the green sweatpants.

Cartman was the first to wake from his mother's inquiry. He saw Kenny lying atop his waist, and he smirked. He liked Kenny on top of him, the blonde's body heat complemented his own well. He could feel the slight pressure of Kenny's bulge on his own, and he kind of liked it. _What the fuck?_ Cartman thought. _Why do I like this?_

"Kinny," Cartman poked the boy's bare shoulder. This wasn't the first time they had been in this position. This was usually how the two wound up every other morning Kenny stayed the night. "Kinny!" He hissed, trying not to wake up Kyle or Stan. Out of frustration, Cartman grabbed the green sweatpants, and yanked them down, exposing the white globes of Kenny's butt. He gave the booty a loud smack, sending a yelping Kenny off of Cartman and into the frame of the bigger bed.

"Ow!" Kenny shouted, effectively waking up Kyle. "What was that for!?"

"You farted on me!" Cartman said, attempting to justify the ass slap, when in reality he just wanted to feel up said ass.

"What time is it?" Kyle asked. It was then that Cartman noticed Kyle's lack of upper body clothing, and the blanket made it look like he wasn't wearing anything.

"Kahl," Cartman breathed in. "Did you sleep **naked** in mah bed?" He asked.

"What? NO! I'm wearing underwear!" He said, blushing fiercely.

"Did you and Stan **do it** in mah bed?" Cartman asked.

"NO! God dammit, I just can't sleep with normal clothes on, I usually wear pajamas." He said, still blushing, as he pulled the blanket off, exposing his underwear-clad body. Kyle had put on a bit of weight, but not enough to make him fat, just to where you couldn't count his ribs. He got up from the bed, waking up Stan, who got out of the bed as well, but he definitely wasn't a morning person. He trudged to the door like a zombie, not to mention, he was also in his underwear. Cartman noticed Stan's morning wood, protruding forward in his tighty whities, as he reached for the doorknob.

"STAN!" Kyle approached the raven-haired boy, grabbing his shoulders and turning him around. He looked over at Cartman and Kenny. "Can one of you get me Stan's pants please?" He said.

Kenny obliged, grabbing Stan's denim jeans from the floor, and approaching the other two. Cartman watched in silence, as Kenny and Kyle helped Stan into his pants, like he was drunk as hell.

"Thanks, Ken, Stan is like a zombie in the morning," Kyle said, with a knowing smirk. "Didn't want him walking around Cartman's house with morning wood!" Kyle blushed.

"So," Kenny said, staring downward, directly at Kyle's ass. "We should...probably get ready for school." He said, trying to break from glaring at the Jew's buttocks.

At least, that's what it looked like to Cartman. Kyle did have a nice ass, it was perfectly rounded, and definitely grabbable. Not that Cartman cared. He was just a stupid Jew, who happened to have the ass of his bitch mom.

"Yeah..." Kyle then blushed further, upon noticing what Kenny was gawking at. He walked stiffly over to Cartman's bed, and grabbed his clothes. He looked at the two boys, he was getting rather annoyed. "Stop looking at my ass!" He shouted, snapping Kenny out of his trance. Cartman shot him an angry glare.

"I wasn't lookin at your ass!" Cartman yelled, acting offended.

"Oh, c'mon Cartman, I saw you lookin' too!" Kenny said. Cartman grew more angry.

"Fuck you Kinny!" He yelled. Kyle shook his head, before stepping into his pants. Stan was slowly and groggily sliding on his shirt. Kenny looked around at the boys. Shrugging, he just pulled down his sweatpants in front of all of them.

"Kenny!" Kyle gasped, his face going red once again.

"You guys saw it all last night, what's the big deal?" Kenny said, as he stepped out of the green pants. The blonde was now standing in the bedroom completely naked. Cartman's mouth gaped open, along with Kyles, and now Stan's as he was now fully awake. Kenny giggled, and then walked over to the dresser, taking his sweet time as he bent over seductively, lifing his rounded ass into the air. He placed the sweatpants in the drawer. He then walked over to the matress, next to Cartman, who remained motionless. Kenny grabbed his bundle of clothes, and began to dress within a foot of Cartman. He stopped after he put his socks and shirt on. "What's wrong with you guys?"

"You're n-naked," Cartman stuttered. "You're in my room naked..." He looked up at the blonde. Kenny shook his head.

"You realize we used to shower together?" Kenny said.

"Yeah, but we were eight years old then." Kyle said, blushing more than before, if that was even possible. "We're older now, things have changed." Kyle explained.

"Things, like what?" Kenny asked, with a slight bit of seductiveness to his voice, as he wiggled his ass toward the other two boys.

"Kenny..." Stan said, with a shocked tone in his voice.

"Stop it right now..." Kyle said, rather angrily. Kenny sighed, and turned toward the boys. They all saw that the blonde boy was hard.

"You guys are no fun." Kenny said, abscent-mindedly showing off his erection, before pulling up his stained-white underwear. Kyle gulped, Stan sighed, and Cartman let out a confused grunt. "If it's a commitment thing, I don't think Stan would mind a little foolin around." Kenny cooed in Stan's direction, causing the boy to blush.

"Quit being gay Kinny!" A blushing Cartman spoke up. Kenny looked back at the fat boy, and smirked, giving him a flash of his penis again.

"You of all people..." Kenny said, shaking his member in Cartman's direction.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP RIGHT NOW!" Cartman shouted, red-faced. "We gotta get to school, and if you say anything else, I will kill you myself!" The fat boy growled. Kenny rolled his eyes, and put his penis away, before getting dressed. Soon all four boys were on their way out to the bus stop, each one not daring to speak.

The four boys stood at the bus stop, freezing in their jackets, when the sound of approaching footsteps broke the silence. They saw that it was just Butters. Again.

"Hey fellas." Butters said.

"Butters." Cartman said. The sweet blonde took note of the unusual silence.

"You fellas alright?" He asked, genuinely concerned for his friends.

"To tell you the truth Butters," Kyle began.

"Kyle you better shut the fuck up!" Cartman barked.

"Fuck you fatass!" Kyle spat back.

"That's the spirit!" Butters cheered.

"Stan and I are a thing." Kyle stated, clutching Stan's gloved hand. Butters cheer was paused, mostly out of confusion.

"A thing?"

"It means he's my boyfriend." Kyle said, pulling Stan closer.

"Are you just gonna tell everybody!?" Stan asked, growing frustrated, and blushing from utter embarassment.

"I have to," Kyle said, looking into Stan's eyes. "Wendy's probably already spreading ridiculous rumours, so we might as well embrace them, to show her we aren't afraid of her!" Kyle said. Stan smiled.

"So you're gay?" Butters was just catching on.

"Uh, yeah..." Kyle said.

"Okay, well that's fine with me." He then proceeded to give Kyle and Stan affectionate kisses on the cheeks. "I-I've always wanted to do that." He blushed, mashing his knuckles together. Kenny approached Butters.

"MMmmrph mmemfph mmpmp mpmporhmm." Kenny said, Butters scratched his scalp and tilted his head in confusion.

"Wh-what'd he say?" Butters asked. Kyle gave Kenny a disgusted glare, then sighed.

"He wanted to know if you're DTF now?" Kyle said, shaking his head at Kenny.

"DTF?" Butters showed his classic naivety.

"It means Down To Fuck." Stan stated bluntly.

"Down to- What?" Butters said.

"Oh Butters..." Kyle sighed. "Kenny is clearly also gay, and he wants to know if he can make love to you..." Kyle groaned.

"Oh, well I'm flattered Kenny," Butters said, in his usual sing-song voice. "B-but I don't do butt stuff... or any stuff..." He said, clearly having no idea what he was talking about. Kenny removed his hood, and approached the boy, placing a hand on his cheek.

"It's okay my little virgin," Kenny cooed. Butters blushed, not exactly knowing what a virgin was, but simply from the skin to skin contact Kenny was making with his face. "I'll teach you **all** the ins and outs." He smirked.

"KINNY STAHP IT!" Cartman shouted. "What the fuck's wrong with you!? You went from zero to faggot in a single night!" He blushed as he said this.

"Oh please..." Kenny said. "You didn't say that when you were-" Cartman aggressively shoved Kenny, sending him into the road, as the bus finally arrived, crushing the boy flat in an instant. The three others looked at Cartman, wide-eyed.

"Oh my God, you killed Kenny!" Stan shouted.

"You bastard!" Kyle shouted back, before snapping out of the trope. "Wait a sec. Why did you kill Kenny?"

"Cuz he was being weird you guys, that was probably a defective Kinny." He made a decent point, apparently, because Stan and Kyle shrugged it off as they got on the bus. Butters, however, was shell-shocked, and had to be dragged on.

*

Craig exited the school bus, with Clyde, Token, and Tweek behind him. The four boys entered the cafeteria, got their breakfast, and sat at their usual table. They ate their breakfasts in an awkward silence. It was Clyde who broke said silence.

"So, about last night..." Craig began.

"No, you shut up Craig!" Clyde snapped, scaring the brunette. Tweek shouted at Craig's unexpected furocity.

"You guys know **I** won't tell anybody." Token said. Craig and Clyde nodded. They knew he wouldn't, because Token was one of the few reasonable human beings in South Park, and besides, he was involved.

"Of course you won't," Craig warned, leaning towards the dark boy. "cuz if you do, I'll just tell everyone you were in on it." He whispered, sending chills down Token's spine.

"Leave him alone, Craig." Clyde scolded. Craig glared at him, with a mixture of hate and understanding. "You know he's not gonna tell." He said.

"GAH!- Y-ya, Token's not a tattle-tale..." Tweek said. Craig, by now, was red-faced, as he recalled last night's events.

Cartman, Kyle, Kenny, and Butters sat at their usual breakfast table. Butters was a little shaken up by seeing Kenny die, he wasn't used to it yet.

"Butters," Kyle patted the blonde's back. "It's okay, Kenny will be back tomorrow." Kyle comforted the smaller boy, feeding him his cereal like he was his mother.

"Yeah, then he can finish saying what he was gonna say, before fatass killed him." Stan said, looking over at Cartman, who was sweating nervously. _God dammit, Kinny..._ He thought. _What am I gonna do?_ With that, Cartman left the table. Stan and Kyle were confused.

"Why do you think Cartman killed Kenny?" Kyle asked Stan, who shrugged his shoulders, then raised his eyebrows.

"I think maybe Kenny was about to spill a secret!" Stan suggested. Kyle's face lit up.

"Of course, but what secret?" Kyle pondered hard. Then he sighed.

"I don't know," Stan said. "But I think Cartman's gonna kill Kenny every day for the rest of his life to keep him from telling that secret." Stan said. Kyle's eyes grew wide, both with concern for Kenny, but also with glee.

"Then this secret is probably pretty big..." He smirked. Stan gave him a glare. "what? I care about Kenny too! It's just that, we'll finally have something new to rip on Cartman for!" He cheered. Stan shrugged and smiled.

Cartman closed the door to the boy's bathroom, and checked the stalls. There was nobody else in here. He sighed, and cursed.

"I can't have them find out what me nad Kinny did..." Cartman said, blushing as he spoke out loud to himself. "But he's just gonna come back, and I'm gonna have to kill him again, and again, and again..." He pondered. He had accepted that he was a border-line sociopath a long time ago, so killing Kenny wasn't the problem, it was the fact that he was going to have to do it on a regular basis.

Just then someone came in the bathroom. It was Butters, followed by Kyle, who was holding his hand. He led the blonde boy to the stall, and let him enter it.

"Is Butters your side ho?" Cartman joked.

"Shut up fatass! He's not used to seeing Kenny die like we are, and he's a little shooken up." Kyle explained.

Cartman rolled his eyes, but internally he felt bad for the boy. He could hear the sound of Butters peeing in the stall. He shook his head of the dirty thought that took over his head.

"What was Kenny gonna say before you killed him?" Kyle asked.

"How the fuck am I supposed to know? He was probably gonna say something faggy, and I was tired of it!" He said.

"So why did you kill him?" Kyle asked the fat boy.

"I killed him because he was defective, I already said!" Cartman shouted angrily, before entering the stall next to Butters. Kyle rolled his eyes, as Butters flushed his toilet, before exiting the stall. Kyle took Butters' hand and led him out of the bathroom. _That settles it._ Cartman thought. _I'm gonna kill Kinny again and again, every day if I have to! Nobody can know!_


	3. So Much For Secrets!

Bunch of Cry Babies.

RATED M: FOR OBVIOUS REASONS.

 _Author's note: This is a rather short chapter, but I think it ended at a good point, so I just left it as it is._

Chapter 3: So Much for Secrets!

It was the next day, and Cartman woke up extra early to catch Kenny. He got into his usual outfit, grabbed a baseball bat, and snuck out into snowy south park. He approached the bus stop, and hid behind a nearby tree. There he waited.

Almost an hour passed until he saw someone approaching. It was Kenny, but he wasn't wearing his trademark poncho. He was donning a simple orange hoodless jacket and jeans, letting his blonde locks and rounded face be visible. Cartman was nearly frozen from being motionless for so long, but managed to walk over to the boy, gripping the baseball bat.

"Well good morning Kinny..." He said, with an evil twang.

"Eric?" Kenny was the only one, besides Butters, who ever called him Eric.

"Don't call me that asshole!" Cartman said, slamming the bat into the bus stop sign, scaring Kenny.

"Don't kill me again please!" Kenny begged. Seeing Kenny's face wasn't a srange thing to Cartman, but seeing him beg certainly was.

"I only killed you cuz you were about to tell those two assholes that we had sex!" Cartman hissed.

"I knew it!"

Cartman's heart nearly shut down upon hearing that all-too-familiar voice of Kyle Broflovski. He and Stan came into view, followed by Butters, who was clutching Stan's hand this time. Cartman dropped his bat, and fell to his knees. Kyle and Stan were confused, but understood the general situation.

"Cartman get up." Stan said.

"So that's it huh?..." Cartman said, beginning to sniffle.

"What are you talking about?" Kyle sighed.

"Now you guys have something else to rip me for...?" Cartman began to full-on cry now. Tears streamed down the fat boy's face. Stan got closer to him.

"No, you're just like us, that's all.." Kenny said, placing a hand on Cartman's shoulder. The fat boy recoiled, and looked at the three boys, then he took one long look at Kenny. Then he pulled out a pistol and fired directly at the poor boy's forehead, sending him flying backward into the bus stop sign, blood pouring from his blonde mop. "Oh my God, you killed Kenny, again!"

"You bastard, again!" Kyle responded impulsively. Butters looked on at the carnage, but was noticeably less vexed than before. Cartman then began to bawl his eyes out, getting up and running away from the other boys.

"Cartman come back!" Stan shouted. He ran after the larger boy. Kyle looked on, and grabbed Butters' hand.

"What's gonna happen now?" Butters asked.

"I dunno, but I'm gonna let Stan handle it today." Kyle said. Butters nodded, as the bus pulled up.

Meanwhile, Stan was still running after Cartman. For being considerabley overweight, Cartman was outrunning the football player. Soon enough, however, his energy diminishes, and Stan catches up in an instant, nearly running into him. He instead stops a few feet from him

"Leave...me...alone...Stan!" Cartman huffs. He is completely worn out from the running.

"Why!? I just want to help you!" Stan said.

"No! Now that you know I like Kinny, you're just gonna make fun of me!" He shouts. Stan is taken aback.

"Aren't you forgetting that Kyle and I are gay?" Stan said.

"It's not you two who I'm worried about." Cartman said, wiping his tears away.

"Well dammit, If anybody tries to rip on any of us for being gay, then we'll all kick their asses!" Stan says, pounding his fists together, showing he did mean business. Cartman's tears stopped. He approached the other boy, and gave him a tight hug.

"Thanks Stan," Cartman said. He then took Stan's hand in his own and the two walked on. "Sorry I killed Kinny again..."

"It's okay, he'll be back tomorrow." Stan reassured him, as they walked on to school, having missed the bus.

 _Author's note 2: Thanks for reading! The next chapter will focus on Craig's gang, I'll get back to the South Park four eventually._


	4. About Last Night

**Chapter 4: About Last Night**

...Hours later...

"We can't just keep ignoring what happened." Craig said. Tweek yelped and Clyde studied his thumb intently, pushing Craig's topic aside. "God dammit Clyde listen!" Craig growled.

"So what if I want to ignore it Craig!?" Clyde shouted. They were alone at Craig's house. His parents were out watching his sister's dance recital.

"I'm just saying that we have to at least discuss it..." Craig said.

"Y-yeah, I've been so -GAH st-stressed since that night..." Tweek said, shaking in his usual manner.

"Fine..." Clyde said, crossing his arms and letting loose a heavy sigh. "What do we need to discuss?" He asked as he recalled that night's events.

... _Two days earlier..._

 _Clyde stormed into Craig's bedroom, interupting an episode of Red Racer. Clyde was pissed, and grabbed Craig by the collar of his shirt, thrashing him about out of nowhere._

 _"Why the fuck would you tell Bebe I'm bi!?" He shouted in Craig's face, who was just as confused as the other two boys._

 _"You're bi?" Craig said, not even caring that Clyde was manhandling him._

 _"Shut the fuck up!" Clyde screamed. "You told her I'm bi and now she doesn't want to be with me anymore!" He yelled. Craig was getting annoyed now, and shoved Clyde away._

 _"I seriously had no idea you were bi dude!" Craig stated._

 _"Yeah right asshole!" Clyde ran at Craig, who simply stepped aside and grabbed the other boy's hair, tugging hard. "AGH SHIT YOU DICK!"_

 _"Even if I knew you were bi, why would I tell Bebe of all people!?" Craig asked. Clyde growled, before yelling out in pain as Craig let him go._

 _"Then how'd she find out?" Clyde said, looking down angrily at his feet._

 _"Maybe cuz you keep gawking at Broflovski's ass..." Craig said. Clyde shot him a vicious glare, before surrendering._

 _"C'mon how can you_ _ **not**_ _look at that ass!?" Clyde tried to reason with Craig. Craig simply nodded._

 _"That just makes you sound super gay." Craig snickered._

 _"Shut up dude..." Clyde said, as he began to sulk. He sat on the floor, and put his knees up to his chest. Craig sighed and approached his friend, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Bebe's gonna tell everybody I just know it..."_

 _"Why does that matter?" Craig asked. "Everybody knows Tweek and I are gay, and nothing's changed." He said._

 _"It matters cuz..." Clyde didn't dare finish that sentence in front of an openly gay boy. He sighed and just slumped his head down, searching for a less controversial response. "It matters cuz..." he couldn't find one. He suddenly shivered at the unexpected touch of Craig Tucker's hands on his bare neck._

 _"You're tense dude..." Craig spoke softly as he kneaded Clyde's stiff neck. The brunette couldn't help but relax under Craig's spell. Craig Motherfucking Tucker was good at this._

 _"Oooh, damn that feels good..." Clyde groaned as Craig worked his magic fingers deep into his shoulders, pressing into every tense fiber in his muscles._

 _"You need to stop worrying about what other people think of you dude..." Craig said. Clyde nodded, not actually listening, just hoping Craig would shut up and keep going. Craig picked up on this and pinched the brunette's skin hard, causing him to yelp. "I'm serious..." Craig said sternly._

 _"Unlike you, I have a reputation to keep up." Clyde shot back rather rudely, on account of being pinched. Craig responded by sliding his hands down Clyde's shirt, and stroking his bare back. The other boy jumped, but didn't fight it, as Craig traced his fingers across Clyde's back, gently caressing every vertebrae of his spine. Clyde let out a shaky breath as Craig continued his gentle touching._

 _"You wanna feel something better?" Craig whispered into Craig's ear. The brunette groaned and shivered. It was then that he caught on to what Craig was talking about, and recoiled._

 _"DUDE! No, I can't..." He said, gasping to regain a normal heart rate. He was sweating, and appeared nervous as can be, whilst Craig gave off the impression of an over confident card-counter at a casino. He gave Clyde a smirk._

 _"C'mon, a little experimentation won't hurt Clyde..." Craig reached over and palmed Craig's crotch through his pants. The brunette boy was frozen with shock at Craig's sudden brashness. Craig's hand rubbed until Clyde was hard, and then proceeded to unbutton his pants._

 _"Craig...stop..." Clyde said, not sounding all that convincing. Craig looked at him with stern eyes, and placed his hand on Clyde's cheek, before pulling him into a deep kiss. Clyde's eyes shot wide as he accepted this new feeling, letting Craig's tongue explore his mouth. They broke the kiss for a second to breathe "Oh god Craig..." Clyde sighed, before they kissed again, with Craig working down the other boy's fly._

 _Just then there was a sound. Clyde and Craig looked over to see Craig's bedroom door wide open, with Token and Tweek standing there, wearing matching looks of shock..._

...current time...

"Well really we just wanna know if you guys are a thing now or what?" Token said.

"I dunno." Clyde said.

"I dunno." Craig said at nearly the same time as Clyde.

"Well comin on to a guy kinda signifies you like him." Tweek said.

"Well... it was in the heat of the moment..." Clyde said, blushing.

"Yeah yeah, I'm sure Craig planned it." Token said, nudging Craig's shoulder.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Craig asked, shooting Token an evil glare.

"Craig, it's obvious to me you like Clyde..." Token explained. "Why else would you hang out with him, I mean the guy isn't the nicest person."

"Fuck you Token!" Clyde shot back.

"And neither am I," Craig said. "What's your point?"

"His point is that you two should just fuck and get it over with!" Tweek spoke up. Craig was shocked at Tweek's sudden response, especially by the bluntness of it.

"Tweek?" Craig said.

"You and I aren't **actually** dating," Tweek said. "so It's not like You're cheating or anything. Craig sighed.

"I know but..." Craig sulked, staring down at his shoes.

"But what?" Tweek said. The usually tense and jumpy blonde was strangely calm now as he approached Craig. "I'm serious, I don't mind that you like Clyde."

"I just don't want to drag Clyde into this..." Craig said, acknowledging the boy in question with a nod. Clyde sighed, and soon stood beside Craig.

"It's okay Craig," Clyde reassured his friend. "I just need some time to think that's all." He said.

"Alright..." Craig said, sighing once again before walking over to his bed, where he simply fell onto the plush matress. "I'm going to bed, see you guys tomorrow..."

"We don't have school tomorrow." Tweek said.

"Then I'll see you Monday..." Craig said, rolling over.

"It's 5:30 dude.." Token said.

"I don't care..." Craig said, his speech muffled by a pillow he was currently smothering himself with.

"Let's leave him alone guys..." Clyde said, gesturing the other two boys to head out. Clyde stayed behind. He walked over to Craig, who's back was turned to Clyde. Clyde pet Craig's black locks, and sighed. "I'm coming over tomorrow." He said.

"What why?" Craig said, confused.

"I'm just coming over..." Clyde repeated, before leaning over and planting a light kiss on Craig's ear. Craig blushed under his pillow as Clyde proceeded to exit the room, leaving Craig to his thoughts...

 _Author's note: What'd you think? Let me know if you'd like to see more of Craig and Clyde's story. In the meantime, I will continue the story of the South Park Four..._


	5. Teddy

_**Author's note:**_ _Thanks for reading. Today we're back to the South Park Four. Warning for light smut(I mean very light) and the obvious foul language. Please leave a review, I'd like to know what needs to be improved upon. Thank you! Now on with the show..._

CRYBABIES_

 **Chapter 5: Teddy**

It was a crisp Saturday morning, and the town of South Park was everything but bustling. The Kyle and Stan were sitting next to one another at the local park, feeding pidgeons. They each had half a loaf of bread, and were slowly widdling them down with each bird.

"Have you guys seen Kenny?" It was Kenny's sister, Karen. She looked rather cold, in her cheap barely held together coat and lack of gloves. She had a red nose, either from wiping constantly or a cold.

"Na, I think he might be at Cartman's house." Stan said. He then proceeded to remove his gloves and hand them to the girl. "Put these on, your hands are probably freezing." He said.

"It's okay." Karen said.

"No, put them on please." Kyle said, in his usual motherly tone. He then pulled out a spare pair of gloves. Karen simply put on Stan's gloves, which were a little too big, but didn't fall off, so it was good enough.

"Thanks Stan." Karen beamed.

"No problem," Then Stan took the spare pair of gloves from Kyle. "Thanks babe." He said, with Karen reacting with a raised eyebrow.

"Babe?" She said. "Are you two-?"

"Yup." Stan said, sounding rather proud. "We've been together for a while, but we've just recently decided to go public!" He said.

"That's cool!" She said, smiling. "I'm happy for you guys!" She said.

"Thanks Karen." Kyle said, taking Stan's hand in his own. "How about we go with you to Cartman's?" He said.

"Nope, I just needed to know where he was," She said. "He just didn't come home last night so..." She said. Kyle didn't want to tell Kenny's sister that her brother died last night, and that that was the reason he didn't come home last night. He instead opted for something else to say.

"He's fine, I promise." Kyle assured her.

"Okay!" She said. "Bye guys!" She said, before taking off in the opposite direction.

"Kenny's sister is adorable." Stan said.

"Yeah, I wish I had a little sister." Kyle said, planting a peck on Stan's cold cheek. "

"Well I have a sister but she's a bitch." Stan snickered. Kyle grinned and they proceeded to walk to Cartman's house.

The arrived at the green house, and immediately noticed the lack of a vehicle in the driveway. They walked up to the front door and knocked once. They stood in the cold for a good minute before Kyle got annoyed.

"I'm gonna call him." Stan offered, pulling out his phone and calling Cartman. The phone rang four times, then went to voicemail. He cursed.

"Try calling Kenny." Kyle suggested. Stan then dialed Kenny, saved in his contacts as _Sexy Bastard_ from when Kenny hacked his phone. Stan giggled upon seeing the contact, then he put the phone up to his ear and waited for an answer, which he got almost immediately.

"Yuuup?" Kenny said on the other end. Stan let out an internal sigh of relief upon hearing his voice. He was always nervous that Kenny would die one day and never come back.

"Hey where are you Ken?" Stan asked.

"Where do you think?" Kenny said rather seductively. Stan shook his head.

"Cut the crap, where are you?" Stan said, chuckling. Kyle however, looked impatient.

"I'm here with Teddy.." Kenny said. Stan laughed.

"With who?" Stan managed to say.

"KINNY WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU SAY TO HIM!?" Stan heard Cartman's familiar voice shouting on the other end. Stan was giggling like a school girl now.

"What?" Kyle mouthed. Stan covered the phone with his hand.

"Kenny calls Cartman 'Teddy'.." Stan snickered. Kyle immediately lost it. Stan put the phone back up to his ear.

"C'mon in boys!" Kenny said. Stan then heard a knock up above him. He looked up to see a face with a familiar mop of blonde hair looking down through the window of Cartman's room. Stan could see his bare neck and shoulders. Was he naked? Stan couldn't handle anymore naked Kenny.

Kyle opened the door and entered, followed by Stan. The two boys shed their snow-covered shoes. They then walked up the stairs to Cartman's room. They were stopped by a familiar fat boy, who was wearing a pair of sweatpants, and no shirt. The two boys were used to seeing Cartman shirtless, but it just seemed weirder with Kenny involved.

"What did you hear?" Cartman interrogated the two.

"We didn't hear anything..." Stan said, grinning.

"...Teddy..." Kyle said, snickering.

"FUCK YOU FUCKIN JEW BITCH!" Cartman shouted. Kyle wasn't even effected by the explitives. He figured he deserved it this time. Cartman stopped mid-rant, attempting to slow his breathing. "I'm...sorry Kyle.." He said.

"What?" Kyle was shocked.

"I said I'm sorry." He said. He then began to breathe slowly. "I'm trying to control my anger gahs..." He said.

"Why?" Stan asked.

"Well I did **kill** Kenny like two times..." Cartman pointed out. "I think I need to control myself." He said. Stan and Kyle shrugged and agreed.

"Where's your mom?" Stan asked. Cartman shrugged his shoulders.

"Dunno, but she said she'd be gone till Monday morning..." He said. Both Stan and Kyle were kind of jealous. Their parents wouldn't even joke about leaving them home alone for more than an hour.

"Okay..." Kyle said. "Where's Kenny?" He asked.

"He's alive I swear.." Cartman joked. He then pointed to his bedroom door. The three boys then approached the door, with Cartman opening it. They looked in to see a blonde boy turned away from them, with his underwear-clad ass sticking straight into the air. He was wiggling his behind while reading a book. "God dammit Kinny put some pants on!" Cartman spat, immediately blushing.

"Why should I?" Kenny said, looking over to see Kyle and Stan, who were equally flustered. Kenny then rose to his feet. "Besides, I don't have any pants, they're in the wash." He said, giving the boys a wicked smirk.

"Stop it Kenny..." Kyle ordered. The blonde recoiled like a struck puppy, and proceeded to plop down onto the floor and fold his arms like a toddler.

"We were just checking to see if Kenny came back..." Stan said, looking at the nearly naked boy. "How you two gettin along?" He asked. Cartman sighed.

"Kinny's being weird as usual.." Cartman said.

"What?" Kenny spoke up "I'm being weird cuz I forgave you for killing me?" He said.

"Well, yeah, you should hate me but you don't and that's weird!" Cartman said. Kenny tisked, and and got back up. He approached the larger boy, and gave him a hug.

"I kinda deserved it dude..." Kenny admitted. "I was being a little too wild there. I'm sorry." Kenny said, rubbing Cartman's bare back.

"Well at least you two aren't fighting anymore..." Kyle said, tugging Stan's arm. Stan looked over to see Kyle gesturing toward Cartman's bed, where Stan could clearly see a condom wrapper on a pillow. Stan went full crimson upon seeing this.

"Yuup!" Kenny said, letting go of Cartman and approaching Stan and Kyle. "We totally fucked this morning!" Kenny boasted. Cartman turned three shades of red and put a hand over Kenny's mouth.

"Kinny what the fuck?!" Cartman shouted. He was mad, but was trying not to get too mad.

"Mmmph mpm mpmpmmmmmph.." Kenny muffled, his mouth covered by Cartman's meaty hand.

"What'd he say?" Stan asked. Kyle looked at him. Cartman let go of Kenny and let him speak.

"I said they already know we had sex," Kenny said. "What's wrong with telling them we did it again?" Kenny said.

"It's not like we went shopping or something, we had **sex."** Cartman said. "You just don't go around telling people we did it!"

"I guess so.." Kenny said, going in to hug Cartman again. "I'm sorry Teddy!" He whined.

"And don't call me that when they're here..." Cartman said, before petting the blonde boy, who almost purred.

"Okay," Stan said, looking over at Kyle. "I guess we should head out now, Kyle?" Stan stuck his hand out, and Kyle took it with a smile.

"Leaving so soon?" Kenny whined. He walked over to Stan and Kyle, He then proceeded to give them each a hug. Stan could feel Kenny's crotch against his. He was hard. Was Kenny just always horny? Kyle blushed as he felt Kenny's bulge against his jeans. Kenny grinned and bit his bottom lip. He pulled away from the hug and the two boys could clearly see his erection. "See ya later then huh?" He said.

"Y-yeah I guess..." Kyle stuttered, before taking Stan with him, exiting the room.

"You're such a slut Kenny..." They heard Cartman say.

"Oh really?" Kenny cooed. "Why don't I prove you right then?" He said. Then they closed the door.

"Kenny **is** a little slutty.." Stan pointed out.

"Yeah, but what do you expect with his upbringing and all..." Kyle said. They then left Cartman's house.

"Where do you wanna go?" Stan asked.

"Your house," Kyle said. "My parents are home, and they are too nosy..." Kyle said, giving Stan a wink.

"Ohh.." Stan said, grinning. "You wanna..?"

"Oh yea..." Kyle breathed, moving closer to the other boy as they walked. "To tell you the truth, Kenny got me all worked up..." Kyle said.

"Yeah," Stan said. "Me too..."

 _Author's note: Next chapter is going back to Craig/Clyde. I figured I'd inform you whenever I was changing scenarios, in case some of you aren't into the Cryde pairing. I've been thinking about starting another story telling the story of a budding relationship between Craig and Butters. Thoughts?_

 _As always, thanks for reading and favoriting. Love you all!_


	6. About Last Night pt 2

_Author's note: It's your boy back at it again with that Cryde action! General warning for smut (legit smut, so basic nsfw stuff) and the usual foul language. Enjoy! Please fav, follow and review, I'll post regularly I promise!_

CRYBABIES_

 **Chapter 6: About Last Night 2**

 _KNOCK KNOCK!_

Craig shot up out of bed upon hearing a knocking at his door. He sighed.

"Mom!" Craig shouted. "Mom you there?!" No answer. His parents were probably still out. Weird. He then looked at his phone to see a missed call. It was from his dad. He groaned and decided to prioritize, getting out of bed, still gown in his boxers and a tank top, and going to his front door. He opened the door, not prepared for the burst of cold. He saw a familiar brunette standing there. "What do you want Clyde?" Craig asked in his usual uphased monotone voice, what everybody in South Park came to refer to as 'Craigspeak'.

"I said I was comin over..." Clyde said. Craig scratched his head and thought hard. He barely remembered Clyde telling him this. He shivered from the cold, and impatiently gestured Clyde to enter.

"Sit in the living room and shut up," Craig ordered. "I gotta call my dad."

"Kay..." Clyde obeyed, sitting down on the living room couch. Craig called his dad, putting the phone up to his ear.

"Sorry dad, I was asleep," Craid said. "What do you need?"

"Well son," Craig's dad said. "There was a helluva blizzard up in denver, so we're gonna be stuck for a while."

"Are you guys okay?" Craig asked, more worried about his sister than anything.

"Yeah yea, we got plenty of food and stuff," He said. "We're just waiting out the blizzard, don't wanna risk getting in a wreck." He said.

"Good, take your time I'll be fine by myself.." Craig assured his father.

"I know you will," He said. "I'll call you when we're on our way home okay?"

"Okay bye." Craig said, hanging up. He sighed, turning to Craig. "On with thing two..." He said. He then walked into the living room to see Clyde laying on the couch, like he was about to go through therapy. "What are you doing here?"

"Laying down, I'm tired." Clyde said.

"Well yeah I figured that." Craig said impatiently. After a moment of silence, Craig took a seat opposite Clyde, like he was the shrink. They sat in silence for a good while. Clyde broke it with a sigh.

"Bebe called me yesterday.." Clyde said. Craig looked over at the brunette. He let out an annoyed sigh.

"And?" Craig said impatietnly. "She begged to suck your dick and you said yes?" He spat.

"Dude." Clyde shot Craig a glare. "What's your problem?"

"First of all, it's only eight in the morning..." Craig said, pointing to his mom's stupid cuckoo clock. "Second, I'm pretty sure you're just here to waste my time, now spit it out!" He growled.

"She asked me out, and I said no!" Clyde said, rather annoyed with Craig's attitude. "I also thought about yesterday..." He said, growing quiet as he let Craig decypher that part.

"...And what conclusion did you decide upon Einstein?" Craig asked, rolling his eyes, expecting the worst like he always did. Clyde shot him a glare.

"Y'know what?" Clyde said, getting up and going to the door. "Forget it then, asshole!" He shouted, as he exited Craig's house, slamming the front door. Craig sat still. What was he going to say? Did Clyde actually like him? Craig cursed as he realized he was being such a dick for no reason. He got up and ran to the door, exiting his house and seeing Clyde walking down the road. Craig took off after him, barely dressed and his feet bare. He ignored the freezing cold and the pain as he was pretty sure he'd cut his foot on somehthing. It didn't matter. He had to know.

"Clyde!" Craig shouted, tackling the boy into the grass. Clyde looked up at Craig, who's face was red.

"Craig...?" Clyde's anger was gone, instead now he was concerned for his friend. "Dude you're gonna get sick-"

"Just fucking tell me!" Craig demanded.

"What?"

"What did you decide?" Craig asked, in more of a command than a question.

"I decided..." Clyde said. "I decided I like you Craig Tucker..." Clyde began to tear up. Craig hugged Clyde tight, basking in his friend's warmth, on account of his current lack of. They rubbed faces, and Clyde planted a firm kiss on Craig's lips. The two then looked intently at each other.

"I'm so so sorry Clyde!" Craig begged forgiveness. "I'm just used to expecting the worst, I thought you didn't like me and-" Clyde put a hand on Craig's cheek, shutting him up.

"Shut up dude..." Clyde said, grinning. Craig could feel a distinct bulge pressing against his leg. He smirked.

"Why don't we finish what we started yesterday?" Craig asked seductively. Clyde grinned.

"Yeah, we better get inside before you freeze to death..." Clyde said, as they began to get up. Craig and Clyde held hands as they walked back to Craig's house.

"Okay, you need to warm up before we do anything..." Clyde ordered, fetching a blanket from Craig's room and wrapping it around them both. Craig snuggled up to Clyde, and soon his shivering stopped. Clyde put on Red Racer, and they watched in silence, simply enjoying each other's warmth and company.

Commercials started, and Craig gave Clyde a smirk. Clyde gulped, both from the general nervousness of being flirted with, and from the unpredictability of Craig Tucker. He gasped as he felt Craig's cold hand running up his shirt, stroking his bare skin. Soon he melted to Craig's touch, falling into the black-haired boy's chest.

"Just relax," Craig cooed, as he stroked Clyde's ear, sending shivers down his spine. "I'm gonna make it up to you for me being a dick earlier." He said.

"You were being a dick.." Clyde snickered. Craig returned with a chuckle, as he began to rub his hands on Clyde's bare chest through his shirt. Clyde shivered, but let out a shaky moan.

"I haven't even gotten to the best part yet.." Craig whispered, kissing Clyde's cheek. The brunette blushed, and bit his lip as Craig's wondering hands approached his pants.

"Wait..." Clyde said. Craig immediately stopped. He began to gently stroke Clyde's face.

"It's okay," Craig said. "This your first time with a guy?" Craig asked, bringing Clyde's face to his own.

"Yeah, well..." Clyde stopped.

"Are... are you a virgin?" Craig asked, pushing a bang out of Clyde's face.

"Yeah..." Clyde said. Craig smiled, before pulling the brunette into a deep kiss. Clyde was like putty in Craig's embrace, allowing the black-haired boy to explore his mouth with his hot tongue. They broke the kiss, gasping for air, and looking into each other's eyes.

"I'll be happy to be your first Clyde.." Craig beamed. "That is if you want me to.." He said.

"Craig..." Clyde began. "I'd love that, just... be gentle.." He said.

"Sure thing babe." Craig said. Clyde blushed at the word 'babe'. Craig caught on.

"Is it too early for 'babe'?" Craig asked.

"No no, I'm just not used to it yet that's all.." Clyde assured Craig. "Craig, can you..."

"Do you want me to touch you again?" Craig asked.

"...yes..." Clyde said, blushing profusely. With that, Craig proceeded to place his hand on Clyde's denim-covered crotch. Clyde let out a shaky breath and let Craig do his work.

"Do you like this?" Craig asked, already knowing the answer based on Clyde's shaky moans.

"Ye-yes..." Clyde said. Craig then began to unbutton the other boy's pants. Clyde gasped as Craig felt up the bulge in his red underwear. Craig proceeded to drag his long fingers against the bulge slowly, teasing the brunette. "Just do it already!" Clyde shouted, blushing profusely at his sudden horniness.

"My pleasure..." Craig cooed. He then grasped Clyde's erection through the underwear, earning a yelp from the brunette. Clyde sunk into Craig's touch, letting out a moan as Craig worked his hard on.

"That feels so good!" Clyde moaned as Craig stroked him faster. Craig enjoyed each sound that came from Clyde's gaping mouth. The black-haired boy began to slowly gring his own erection into Clyde's hip. Clyde noticed this, but wasn't about to stop it.

"I think it's time we got rid of **these."** Craig whispered, and before Clyde could say anything, his erection was exposed to the room. Craig grasped it tightly, causing Clyde's eyes to roll back as he let out a wanting groan. Craig began to pump Clyde's hard member faster, sending the brunette into a fit of moans and heavy breathing.

"Oh shit..." Clyde cursed as he was close.

"That's it," Craig cooed, grinding Clyde harder and speeding up his hand. "Cum for me babe!" Craig said. Clyde bit his lower lip.

"Ohh shit ohhh Ahhhhhnnn!" Clyde shouted as he came, shooting thick ropes of cum all over Craig's hand and his own jacket. Craig continued to pump him for all he had. At the same time, Craig was humping him. Clyde looked over at him. "Lemme do you.." Clyde wheezed.

"No, you're too tired," Craig said, pulling his boxers down and revealing his own cock. "But you can watch me cum..." He said as he began to viciously jerk off in front of Clyde, who looked on with glazed eyes. Clyde reached out and fondled Craig's balls as the black-haired boy sped up.

"Go ahead and cum wherever you want..." Clyde said, as he stroked Craig's taint. "...Babe..." He added.

"Oh shit Clyde..." Craig whined. "I'm gonna- AAHHH!" With that he came, all over Clyde's face and chest. Craig tried his best to pull away, but he just kept cumming. Soon he fell over next to Clyde, pulling the other boy into a kiss. Craig ignored the cum on Clyde's lips, and just basked in the afterglow with his new lover...

 _AUTHOR'S NOTE: Well there you go! A good old smut story for all you perverts out there (jk I love all of you!). The next chapter wi_ _ll be a big one, so it might take awhile to finish._

 _As always, review, fav, and follow. I promise to post regularly._


	7. Nobody Breaks Up With Wendy Testaburger!

_Author's note: How's everybody doing? This is going to be a big chapter. In case it's not evident by now, I despise Wendy Testaburger... alot..._

 _General warning for smut,(There will be sex) and the obvious foul language._

 _As always, follow, fav and review! Love you all!_

CRYBABIES

 **Chapter 7: Nobody Breaks Up With Wendy Testaburger!**

 _Meanwhile..._

"So I'm pretty sure Stan and Kyle are gay..." Wendy said in her usual snotty tone. She was conversing with Bebe at the local coffee shop. This was a typical post-sleepover breakfast, different only because Wendy wasn't with Stan this time. Bebe questioned this internally, and wasn't even going to ask, but Wendy was more than happy to bring it up on her own.

"What?" Bebe looked up from her macchiatto.

"I said I think they're gay," Wendy repeated. "for each other." She elaborated. Bebe was slightly less confused, but still confused.

"And why do you think this?" Bebe asked, rolling her eyes.

"Cuz Stan broke up with me, and brought Kyle to help," Wendy said. "Don't you see?"

"No, I must've forgot my crazy glasses..." Bebe deadpanned.

"He was going to confess he's been sleeping with Kyle, but he decided against it at the last minute but Kyle tagged along anyway..." Wendy explained. Bebe pinched the bridge of her nose and let out a sigh.

"Kyle and Stan are best friends..." Bebe said. "Kyle just came with him for moral support, it's a guy thing." Bebe said.

"I'm not convinced..." Wendy said, taking a drink of her frappe. "Males don't usually result to pack tendencies unless threatened." Wendy said. Bebe shook her head.

"No, what you should've said was. 'gee, I guess you're right Bebe, maybe I should be a little less crazy, then maybe I'd actually keep a boyfriend...'." Bebe said. Wendy shot her a glare.

"Fine bitch, I'll just go to the Asians then!" Wendy spat, getting up from her seat, and storming to the door.

"The Asians? No you can't do that!" Bebe panicked, getting up to rush Wendy, grabbing her wrist. "Leave Stan alone, he's been through enough..." Bebe begged.

" **Nobody** breaks up with Wendy Testaburger!" Wendy growled, tearing her wrist from Bebe's grip, before exiting the coffee shop, leaving behind her Mint Mocha frappe.

oOo

"You're such a slut Kinny." Cartman said. Kenny returned his comment with a smirk. The blond placed a hand on the larger boy's face. Kenny planted a firm kiss on his lips, pulling away and giggling.

"Why don't I prove you right then?" Kenny cooed, before shoving Cartman onto his bed. The larger boy grunted as he landed on the matress. He was just about to shout when Kenny placed a finger on his lips. "Don't you move babe, I'm gonna make you squeal!" Kenny purred. Cartman let out a shaky breath.

"Don't talk to me like that-" Cartman stopped as soon as Kenny grabbed ahold of his member, squeezing it slowly. Cartman melted under Kenny's touch, writhing and groaning as Kenny stroked him. "God dammit Kinny..."

"Yeah, say my name Teddy..." Kenny said, as he sped up. Cartman moaned against his own wrist as he tried to muffle himself. Kenny kissed up and down his bare chest, sucking on his nipples for added pleasure.

"Fuck...Kinny..." Cartman wheezed, trying to regain control. Kenny planted a sloppy kiss on Cartman's nose, and gave him a cheesy grin.

"That's the idea isn't it Teddy?" Kenny said in a nasaly voice, making Cartman cringe. With that Kenny slid off his underwear, revealing his hard member, but he ignored it as he straddled his larger lover. "Do you want to bend me over this time?" Kenny asked, that same cheesy grin never leaving his face.

"Fuck yea.." Cartman said, getting up. Kenny rolled off of him and bent over the edge of the bed, sticking his ass in the air and wiggling it. "Don't we need to get ready first?" Cartman asked.

"Na, just fuck me daddy!" Kenny moaned. Cartman snickered.

"Daddy?" Cartman repeated.

"Figured you'd like to be called daddy..." Kenny paused. Cartman began to laugh, causing Kenny to whine. "you gonna fuck me or not, cuz I'll just go find Craig!" Kenny said.

"Oh you better not!" Cartman then just started fucking Kenny, nothing but a little spit and precum to aid in the general motions. Kenny let out a loud moan as Cartman began to pound him.

"Oh yeah that's how I like it!" Kenny shouted. Cartman groaned, he liked the things Kenny said during sex. Granted, they'd only had sex a total of three times so far, but it just kept getting better and better.

"Take it!" Cartman growled into Kenny's ear, causing the boy below him to shiver. Cartman slid in and out of him with near ease. Kenny was an experienced bottom, hence his slut status amongst the boys of South Park. But Kenny is honest with Cartman, and would always tell him when he wanted to fuck another boy. Cartman usually had no problem with it, as long as he didn't give him any diseases.

"Oh yeah, I'll take **all** of you Teddy! AGH SHIT!" Kenny moaned as he came all over Cartman's bedspread. Cartman didn't care, he just continued to enjoy the feeling of Kenny around his hard cock. Kenny was a moaning mess on the bed as the fat boy humped him swiftly.

"I'm gonna cum!" Cartman announced, biting Kenny's ear, signalling the boy to clench. Cartman rammed him harder.

"Oh fuck me! FUCK ME!" Kenny yelled as he pushed back against Cartman's assault

"Say my name!" Cartman begged. Kenny involuntarily moaned.

"E-Eric! Oh fuck me Eric!" Kenny shouted. With that, Cartman buried himself inside Kenny, filling him up with his seed. Kenny also came again, letting out a loud moan as he did so. Cartman collapsed, almost crushing his lover, but knowing better and rolling to his side next to the blonde boy, his cock coming out with a humourous 'pop' sound.

"Did I hurt you Kinn?" Cartman asked. He didn't like being rough with Kenny when they had sex, even when he literally asked for it.

"No no no..." Kenny said, moaning into the sheets. "I came twice..." Kenny grinned, giving Cartman a kiss on the lips.

"Kinny.." Cartman said. "I love you.."

"I love you too Teddy!" Kenny said, as he gave Cartman a hug, which they never broke. They fell asleep in each other's arms.

oOo

"Well," Wendy sighed. " **that** was an experience..." She leaned back in her chair. She looked around at the blank spot on the wall where a picture of her and Stan was once hung. She stared at the blank spot with seering hatred. She just got back from a meeting with the Asians. She had them draw up a bunch of pictures of Kyle and Stan being gay together.

Her wicked plan was bubbling to the surface. She was going to spread the rumour of Stan and Kyle's heated affair all across the school. She was going to humiliate them for wronging her. Wendy turned around in her chair and laughed maniacly. Just then there was a knock on her door.

"Who is it?" Wendy asked.

"It's me!" A voice said. Wendy didn't recognize the voice.

"Who's 'me'?" She asked, being a general smartass. The voice went silent.

"Do I have to u-use the codename?" The voice stuttered. Wendy recognized it now, but wanted to maintain a system.

"Yes, now, 'who is it?'" She asked again, seeming to be playing the role of the innocent girl.

"It's s-seargent squirrel..." The voice said.

"Oh c'mon in miss Squirrel." Wendy feigned delight, as the person entered the room. There stood a short kid gown in a turqoise skirt, with matching shoes and knee-high socks. This kid was clearly a boy, with his demeanor and rounded male facial features. He seemed quite girly sometimes, but under that frail personality and curved figure, he was all boy.

"R-remind me again why my codename is 'Seargent Squirrel'?" Butters asked, frowning.

"Cuz it fits you," Wendy stated, before hopping off her chair and going to her backpack. She pulled out fat yellow folder and handed it to Butters, who took it. "Now your job is to hang these flyers all over the school." She said.

"What's on them?" Butters asked.

"Oh just various drawings done by the Asians..." Wendy said. Butters opened the envelope and pulled out one flyer, depicting a curly haired ginger boy kissing a dark haired boy with the word 'Style' in the background.

"These two look an awful lot like Stan and Kyle.." Butters pointed out.

"That's the point," Wendy said. "Then everybody will know that they are gay for each other..." Wendy said, rubbing her hands together.

"Oh jeez, why am **I** doin this?" Butters asked.

"You want to be one of the girls don't you?" Wendy answered Butters' question with a question.

"Yeah, but I think this is a little uh sh-shitty." Butters said. Wendy rolled her eyes.

"This is a test of your commitment," Wendy said. "You have to show the girl council that you aren't on the boys' side, and doing this will definitely prove that." She said. Butters sighed.

"But Stan and Kyle are my friends.." Butters said. "Isn't there another way to get into the girls' club?" He begged. Wendy sighed, mocking regret in her decision.

"I wish there was." She said. Butters sulked, before looking up to Wendy.

"Fine..." Butters said, before leaving Wendy alone in her room. Wendy sat back in her chair, leaning back and laughing.

"It'll be like Craig x Tweek all over again, but this time it will humiliate them! Stan will beg me to prove the Asian's wrong by having me fuck him, then we'll be back together and everything will be the like it was before..." She cackled away as the sunset drew near...

oOo

"You got any lotion?" Kyle asked. Stan looked up from his laptop as he saw Kyle's magnificent ass, bent over, looking in his drawer, presumabely for the lotion in question. Stan couldn't answer, on account of the brilliant booty in front of him. "Hey!" Kyle yelped, snapping Stan out of it.

"S-sorry, It's in the top drawer." Stan said. He shook his head, and resumed typing his essay. He was slightly cheating, with Kyles essay to the side for reference, but their teacher was so ignorant, that he proably wouldn't notice if Stan just copied Kyle's essay word by word. But Stan was smarter than that, and only copied things he thought were essential.

"Thanks." Kyle said, pulling the bottle of lotion out of the top drawer and walking out of the room. Kyle was wearing just a pair of blue underwear, one of Stan's. He gave Kyle's ass one firm look over as he walked out the door. Stan was just wearing a simple pair of boxer shorts. They figured they'd get comfortable, because his mother had the heat up a little too high, and Stan didn't dare mess with the thermostat.

Soon Kyle returned, put the lotion back where he found it, and crawled onto the bed next to Stan. Stan sighed and facepalmed at the essay he was writing.

"This essay has got to be the most **pointless** thing I've ever done..." Stan whined, giving his hands a rest from the keyboard. Kyle scooted behind him and began to massage his shoulders.

"Don't be such a baby.." Kyle whispered into Stan's ear, following it up with a "just kidding babe.." before kissing the bare skin of Stan's neck.

"Kyle?" Stan said.

"What is it?"

"I'm worried about Wendy..." Kyle sighed, but went along.

"Wendy?" Kyle crawled back in front of Stan.

"Do you think I was a little too blunt with her?" Stan asked. Kyle put is face in his hands.

"To be honest, I did most of the talking," Kyle said. "Not that I let you talk, I kinda took over there, and for that I'm sorry."

"It's okay, but I **did** call her a bitch..." Stan said.

"She was playing her girl tricks..." Kyle scowled. "You know how she is, she'll try to make you feel bad even though it's all her fault."

"I just feel like she really liked me," Stan said, Kyle looked up at him. "I don't like **her,** I'm over girls... but.."

"You've always been the sensitive one..." Kyle said, crawling over to Stan and picking up his laptop, setting it aside. Stan sighed, leaning back against his pile of pillows. Kyle gave him a kiss, paying attention to make it deep and passionate. "if she really liked you she would've fought for you, **I'd** fight for you Stan..." Kyle said, kissing Stan again. Stan hugged Kyle tight.

"I love you Kyle..." Stan said, tearing up in Kyle's embrace. Kyle pet his black hair.

"I love you too Stan...Shhh..." Kyle kissed Stan's forehead. He then began to stroke Stans back. Stan let out a relaxed breath. "I'm gonna make you forget about Wendy..." He said. Kyle ran his fingers down Stan's spine, and all the way to his waist, where he glided to his front. He felt up Stan's package through the boxers, causing him to moan. Kyle got to work, rubbing Stan's slowly growing member through the thin fabric.

"I needed this..." Stan moaned. Kyle smiled, pleased that he was making his lover feel good. He grasped Stan's erection though the boxers, and began to slowly masturbate him.

"We **both** needed this..." Kyle said, as he continued to jerk Stan off. The black-haired boy was moaning in his grasp. Kyle let go and slowly pulled the boxers off, asking Stan to lift is ass so he could remove them. Stan obliged and lifted his waist, his erection flopped out as soon as Kyle pulled down. Kyle tossed the boxers aside. "When are your parents and Shelly coming back?" Kyle asked, his hand grasping Stan's bare cock.

"T-tomorrow," Stan said, holding back a moan as Kyle moved his hand along his member. "They went with Craig's parents to watch some dance recital or someth- AAAH!" Stan moaned out loud as Kyle picked up his pace.

"Sorry Stan..." Kyle giggled, kissing his lover. "I just love the noises you make babe.." He said. Stan sighed, grabbing Kyle's hand. He gave Kyle a kiss on his cheek.

"You're gonna pay for that.." Stan said, rather orderly. Kyle grinned, laying on his back, his own erection quite evident in 'his' underwear.

"Punish me babe..." Kyle said, tracing a hand up his chest, and stroking a nipple. Stan crawled over to Kyle, and planted a kiss ono his belly. He kissed up to his nipples, which he proceeded to lick and suck softly. Then out of nowhere, he bit one, causing Kyle to yelp, but it ultimately turned into a needy moan. "OH PUNISH ME!" Kyle moaned.

"I'm gonna punish you!" Stan said. He stuck his finger into the underwear through the leg hole. He felt up Kyle's rock hard erection, then he trailed down to his hot balls, then he stroked the taint. Kyle let out a harsh moan. Stan then ran his finger down to Kyle's pucker. He prodded the opening. He noticed it was already wet and as he pushed his finger in, he also noticed that there was little to no resistance. Kyle moaned.

"Ohh yeah.. I got ready for you Stan..." Kyle said, his eyes rolling from the feeling of Stan's finger.

"I guess that's why you needed the lotion huh?" Stan sighed, pulling his finger out with a satisfying popping noise. Kyle took the liberty of removing his underwear for Stan, continuing to finger his hole. "Man you are one horny boy..." Stan cooed. Kyle nodded.

"You're damn right," Kyle moaned. He plunged his finger into his entrance at an ever-increasing pace. "now hurry up and fuck me Stan!" Kyle begged. Stan couldn't wait either, and was soon on top of him, lining his cock up with Kyle's needy hole.

"Kiss me Ky..." Stan breathed. Kyle nodded, as they joined in a deep kiss, battling each other's tongues. Kyle let out a moan as Stan entered him. Stan bit his bottom lip to stifle a moan himself as he began to rhythmically fuck Kyle.

"Oh God!" Kyle shouted, as Stan rocked back and forth in an out of him. Kyle's moans and Stan's grunts filled the room. Stan was pretty sure the neighbors could hear, but he didn't care. He continued to ram Kyle hard until he was screaming his name. "Stah! Oooh my God Stan FUCK ME!" Kyle begged as he pushed back against Stan's cock. The black haired boy sped up even more and soon you could hear the skin of his pelvis slapping against Kyle's bubbly ass.

"I'm gonna cum..." Stan announced. Kyle moaned loudly as he kissed Stan again.

"M-me too! AHH!" Kyle said. Stan then took Kyle's face in his hands.

"Let's cum together!" Stan said, giving Kyle one more kiss before they both came, Stan filling up Kyle's entrance, and Kyle erupting all over himself and Stan's chest. Stan stayed in Kyle for a while, riding out his orgasm and kissing Kyle over and over. "God I fucking love you Ky..." Stan wheezed.

"I love you too." Kyle said. He slipped out of Stan's embrace, and pulled off of Stan's cock. Kyle then got up off of the bed.

"Wh-where are you going?" Stan asked, panting.

"Gonna go get some wet rags to clean our mess up," Kyle said, pointing to the cum on his own chest. "You just get some rest, I'll finish your essay." He said.

"Thanks..." With that Stan was out cold. Kyle gazed upon his lover, his nude body sprawled out on the sheets, which definitely needed to be washed. Kyle admired the one peculiar birth mark on Stan's left ass cheek, and traced his gaze up to his lucious black locks of hair he got from his father. One of the only good traits.

"I'll never let Wendy hurt you..." Kyle whispered to himself. He then proceeded to walk naked to Stan's bathroom. There he turned on the shower and stepped inside. He let the steaming water cascade his nude form, as he scrubbed himself clean of the fruit of his heated labor.

 _Wendy Testaburger is such a bitch..._ Kyle thought, as he applied a generous glob of shampoo and conditioner to his curly mop. _Why can't she just leave Stan alone?_

Kyle exited the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist and a wet rag in hand. He walked into Stan's room to find him lying on his back now, with his limp cock on display. Kyle smiled and walked over to him, and began the delicate task of wiping him clean like a baby. Once he was finished, he noticed that Stan had grown erect. Kyle giggled and gave Stan's cock a few good tugs, causing the boy to whimper.

He then exited Stan's room, taking his phone with him, and tossed the rag in a hamper. Kyle went to the kitchen and poured himself a glass of milk. He opened his phone and scrolled through his contacts, eventually finding Wendy Testaburger. He hit dial and put the phone up to his ear. It was only 7:30, so she was bound to be home and awake.

"Hello?" Kyle heard Wendy say. "Who's this?"

"Yeah Wendy it's Kyle..." Kyle said. Who's this? Kyle had her in his contacts and he hated her, but she didn't have him in **her** contacts?

"Oh hey," Wendy said, sounding uncomfortable. "Whaddya need? Is Stan okay?"

"Stan is fine..." Kyle said. "He's asleep he's had a helluva weekend so far." Kyle said.

"Well why did you call me?" She asked.

"I wanted to talk to you about this whole mess.." Kyle said. Silence on the other end indicated a sigh from Wendy.

"Specifics?"

"I'm begging you..." Kyle said. "I'm fucking begging you to leave Stan alone, trash me all you want, just leave Stan alone..." Kyle pleaded.

"Why should I?" Wendy. " **He** broke up with **me.** " She growled.

"God dammit he-" Kyle stopped himself. Like Cartman, he needed to control his anger. He sighed. "Stan is alot more fragile than you think..."

"I bet after the good butt-fucking you gave him he's pretty fragile." Wendy spat. Kyle bit his tongue, trying his best to not lose it on the bitch.

"Stan's been worried about **you**." Kyle said. "He thinks he was too hard on you. He doesn't like you anymore as a girlfriend, but he still doesn't want you to be hurt..."

"I see how it is..." Wendy said.

"See how **what** is?" Kyle was getting mad now. "I'm trying to tell you he doesn't fucking like you, but you keep ignoring it because you're desparate for attention!" Kyle spat. He covered his mouth, cursing to himself for letting his temper get the better of him.

"Yeah I definitely see how it is..." Wendy said. "Don't worry Kyle, **I** will leave Stan alone, but that doesn't mean somebody **else** won't." She said with a snicker.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Silence. "Listen bitch, if you make Stan cry again, I'm gonna fuck you up-" Wendy hung up. Kyle, enraged, hurled his phone across the living room, causing it to collide with the wood of Stan's staircase. This dented said wood, and destroyed Kyle's phone. The redhead cursed, running over to collect his phone. He surveyed the wreckage. The screen was fucked, shattered to the point that even if it worked, you couldn't read anything.

Kyle through his phone in a ziploc bag and went back to Stan's room. He was pissed, but tried his best to not begin a rant and wake up Stan. Instead he took to Stan's computer, opening up facebook messenger, and messaging Cartman. Of all people.

 _C:What do you want, Stan?_

 _K:It's Kyle, I'm using Stan's computer, my phone is fucked..._

 _C:Wow what happened?_

 _K:I'll explain later, I just got done talking to Wendy._

 _C:How's the bitch dealin?_

 _K:She's not dealing with anything. I think she's up to something._

 _C:Like what?_

 _K:IDK Dude, but she's trying to get back at Stan._

 _C:Back at Stan? What'd he do? The breakup was_ _ **her**_ _fault!_

 _K:Ikr. You were right, she just want's Stan to fill the emptiness in her soul._

 _C:I said life, but soul makes more sense lol. So why are you telling me?_

 _K:I need you to do your usual thing..."_

 _C:Thing?_

 _K:You know, how you ruin people's lives who piss you off? I need you to pull a Scott Tennerman._

 _C:That's a good idea, but I can only do that shit if Matt and Trey say I can._

 _K:You need their permission?_

 _C:Yup, what assholes, right?_

 _K:Nah, I think I like the idea that you need their permission to be a total dick, but now I'm questioning their decisions on numerous occasions. But whatever._

 _C:I wish I could do something._

 _K:It's okay, I'll just face the music. Good night Eric..._

 _C:Why'd you call me that?_

 _K:I figured you prefered that to Cartman, and you've been alot nicer than usual lately, so I'm returning the favor I guess._

 _C:Nah, call me whatever's easier. Night night Jew._

 _K:Is that easier for_ _ **you**_ _to say?_

 _C:Sorry it's just impulse at this point..._

 _K:lol. It's okay, good night!_

Kyle closed the messenger and leaned back in Stan's office chair. He let out a whispered annoyed sigh. What was he going to do? Wendy was no doubt going to try her best to ruin Stan's life, and he didn't deserve it. Kyle felt like screaming, and hitting stuff and crying. He looked back to the computer to log off, but something caught his eye. It was a photo post by a one Marjorine Stotch. It was of Marjorine(Butters) in a cute turqoise skirt and knee-high socks. He was wearing a matching blouse and turqoise shoes.

The sight made Kyle smile. He was happy that Butters was growing more confident in showing his crossdressing to the world. The status said, 'felt cute, might delete later...' Kyle, upon seeing this, took to the comments.

 _You better not delete this! You look lovely Marjorine, don't let anybody tell you different!_ He hit post. Within seconds there was a reply.

 _Oh gee thanks_ _ **Stanly Marsh.**_ It was from Marjorine. Kyle gasped upon realizing he was on Stan's profile. _Whoops,_ Kyle thought. Kyle exited facebook and logged off. He got up from the chair and crawled into bed beside naked Stan. He rested against the black-haired boy. He was just beginning to fall asleep when he heard the familiar ping of a text. Kyle looked over to see Stan's phone light up with notification. Kyle read it. It was a text from Butters saying 'Stan? You awake?'.

Kyle reluctantly picked the phone up. He was sure Stan wouldn't mind him using his phone, especially if he knew the current condition of Kyle's. Kyle texted Butters.

 _K: Stan is asleep Butters, this is Kyle, whatcha need?_

 _B: Oh gee Kyle, I messed up..._

 _K: What do you mean? Are you okay?_

 _B: I'm okay, but I feel like shit..._

 _K: What happened?_

 _B: Wendy told me to hang up a bunch of posters all over school, and I did I'm so sorry Kyle..._

 _K: Posters? Posters of what?_

 _B: Posters saying that you and Stan are gay. I'm sorry I'm so so sorry!_

 _K: Why did you do that Butters?_

 _B: I did it because Wendy said she could make me one of the girls if I did. Even if that is true, It's not worth ruining your guys' relationship._

 _So that's what Wendy was talking about..._ Kyle thought.

 _K: It's okay Butters, It's only Saturday, me and you can go tomorrow and take down the posters._

 _B: Sure thing Kyle! What about Stan?_

 _K: He doesn't have to know about this. I'll delete this thread after tonight. It's going to be okay._

 _B: I'm sorry I bet she was lying anyway..._

 _K: Knowing Wendy, she probably was..._

 _B: Thanks for not getting mad at me Kyle. Good night._

 _K: I have no reason to be mad at you Butters, it's not your fault. Good night!_

Kyle deleted the conversation from Stan's phone, and cuddled up next to the boy. Kyle wrapped his hands around Stan's mid section and fell asleep, feeling relieved that they just might beat Wendy Testaburger...

...TO BE CONTINUTED...

 _Author's note: Looking back, I realize how retarded that attempt at a fourth wall break was, but I left it in anyway. Whole lotta love-making in this chapter. Hope you guys liked it. I'm sort of making Wendy out to be the big villain of the story. Don't worry, Craig and Clyde will become an immediate part of the story soon, be patient. To those who are still reading, thank you so much. I usually write these chapters in a day, but this one took about three days altogether, due to a rewrite, with a corrupt flash drive to blame. I lost so much material:(. Thanks for reading, faving and reviewing. I love you all!_


	8. Poster Boys

_Author's note: Back at it again! Crybabies Chapter 8 is finally here! I've been slaving over this chapter for too long._ As always thank you so much for all the favs and follows! It means the world to me!

CRYBABIES_

 **Chapter 8:** _Poster boys_.

 _ **The next day...**_

Kyle met Butters outside his house that chilly morning. He had to crawl out from underneath Stan as to not wake him up, then go to his house. He was borrowing Ike's phone, which he never used, on account of being too young to need to text anyone. Kyle saw Butters sitting on the curb, he was gown in his usual attire, today adding a beanie, which looked weird on Butters, but it completed his outfit.

"You doing okay Butters?" Kyle said, sitting beside the smaller blonde. Butters looked over at him and sighed.

"Oh Kyle, I dunno..." Butters drawled. "I just feel like crap that's all.."

"Hey," Kyle said, placing a hand on Butters' shoulder. "You did your best. Wendy tricked you, but you stood up for what's right..." Kyle said.

"I guess so.." Butters gave Kyle a weak smile.

"There's that smile!" Kyle grinned, pinching Butters' cheek like a grandma, causing the smaller blonde to giggle.

"You're so touchy Kyle!" Butters commented, smiling.

"Sorry.." Kyle said.

"Nah, it's okay..." Butters said. "I like it, it's like you're my mom or something." Butters said. Kyle glared at him. That title felt weird to him, but it did make sense. Kyle was always over-protective about Butters, especially around Kenny and his promiscuous ways.

"Thanks Butters." Kyle grinned. "Now where are these posters?" He asked. Butters got down to business.

"All over school, mostly in the hallways," Butters explained. "I remember where they all are." He said.

"Okay." Kyle said, pulling out Ike's blue phone. "I'll text Cartman to meet us at the school, we'll need all the help we can get."

"Eric?" Butters looked confused as to why Kyle would ask Cartman for help of all people.

"He's changed Butters..." Kyle said. "I'll let him explain when we meet him, he'll bring Kenny with him too."

"Oh gee, o-okay then..." Butters said as Kyle shot the text to Cartman's phone.

oOo

Cartman's eyes shot open at the sound of a text notification. He grabbed his phone and opened the messenger. It was a text from an unknown number.

 _This is Kyle, I'm using Ike's phone. I need you to meet me and Butters at the school this morning please please. Bring Kenny! Thank you in advance!_

Cartman blinked. The school? Butters? He didn't want to sit and think about this too long, Kyle needed his help, and It's not like he was planning on doing anything today(beside's gay sex). Not to mention, he was trying to be more of a friend to Kyle and Stan, and friends helped friends.

"Kinny get up!" Cartman said, poking Kenny's bare ass with his finger. He gave said ass a few slaps, not trying to hurt him, but getting really annoyed with him as well.

He figured he'd try something kinky, and licked his finger, before jamming it into Kenny's hole. Cartman expected Kenny to jump awake, instead the boy moaned and spread his cheeks to allow Cartman further access. Cartman sighed. This wasn't the time for sex. They needed to meet Kyle at the school. He removed his finger, much to Kenny's disapproval.

"Kinny we gotta go see Kahl!" Cartman whispered into Kennny's ear. Kenny rolled over, exposing his morning wood. "Are you always horny?" Cartman giggled.

"Well you **did** just finger me dude..." Kenny deadpanned. Cartman shrugged. "Why do we gotta go see Kyle?" Kenny whined, having been rejected his morning fuck. Cartman sighed.

"It's a Wendy thing..." Cartman said.

"Oh lord, " Kenny said, sitting up in the bed. "Will she **ever** give up on Stan?"

"Not until she's dead I'm afraid..." Cartman said. Kenny looked at him, and raised his eyebrows.

"Kidding..." Cartman said. "I'm kidding.."

"I wouldn't mind killing her." Kenny said.

"Stop it Kinny..." Cartman said. He tossed a shirt at the blonde. "Git dressed, we gotta meet him at the school." Kenny sighed, looking down at his erection, pouting like a toddler. Cartman watched this and sighed.

"Fahn," Cartman groaned, sitting on the bed next to Kenny, and grabbing hold of his erection. Kenny let out a moan. "But after you cum, we're going, even if I have to drag you out of here naked." Cartman said, as he began to pump the blonde boy's hard member.

"Okay, I promise!" Kenny gave a cheesy grin and a thumbs up. Cartman began to rub the tip of Kenny's penis with his thumb, causing the blonde to yelp.

"You like that?" Cartman asked, as bent down to lick Kenny's tip slowly. He pulled back and began to stroke a little faster.

"Oh hell yeah," Kenny moaned. "Make me cum Teddy!" Kenny bit his lip as Cartman sped up his hand. The blonde was petting Cartman's hair while he was masturbated. Kenny hissed as he got closer to cumming. Cartman gave the blonde boy a light kiss that developed into a deep one, tongue and all.

"You gonna cum?" Cartman asked upon breaking the kiss. Kenny responded with a mere nod and a whimper. Soon the blonde boy was moaning loud as he shot cum all over Cartman's hand and arm. Cartman milked him dry and licked the rest off of his hand. "Okay, c'mon we gotta go!" Cartman said. Kenny was spent, but a promise was a promise. Kenny slowly got dressed on account of his exhaustion from cumming so hard.

Cartman was all ready long before Kenny was, in fact, he was busy helping Kenny get his pants on. He really took a lot out of him.

"Sorry Kinny," Cartman said, stroking Kenny's cheek. "When we get back home, I'll make it up to you, we just gotta help Kahl and Stan."

"I know it's okay Teddy.." Kenny said, pecking Cartman's cheek. "That was the best handjob I've ever had babe."

"No problem," Cartman said, looking at the time. "C'mon let's go!" He said, taking Kenny's hand and leading him out of the house.

oOo

Cartman and Kenny held hands as they walked down the sidewalk, on their way to the school. Cartman was wearing his usual getup, whilst Kenny was wearing one of Cartman's sweaters, which was way too big for him, but it kept him warm. The sweater hung down almost to Kenny's knees. He had on a pair of jeans below that.

They passed a few familiar houses, all the time remaining close. Cartman was not ashamed of Kenny, and wanted to be more open about their relationship. However, he was still a little self-conscious of what people would think of him, considering he'd spent most of his life being a homophobic asshole.

Kenny, on the other hand, was excited that Cartman was finally coming out of his shell. Kenny wanted to parade around the neighborhood, and proclaim his love for Cartman through a megaphone to the masses. That would be a little uncalled for, though.

"Good morning Cartman..." Cartman heard a distinct nasaly voice say. The two turned to see Craig Tucker seated on a bench they had passed mere seconds ago. How they didnt' notice Craig their before was beyond them. Craig had a way of blending in.

"Uhh.. good morning Craig..." Cartman said. Something didn't feel right, Craig never called him 'Cartman'. It was always 'fatass' or 'dickhead'.

"You guys out on a date?" Craig asked. Cartman felt a spark go off in the back of his head. Anger. He put it out though, and decided to humour him.

"Yup, in fact we just got done having sex!" Cartman boasted. Now Kenny was the one freaking out, shaking Cartman's shoulder. The larger boy calmed him. "I got this Kinny." He turned to Craig.

"Wait what?" Craig's eyebrows went up.

"You listen here Craig. Kenny and I **are** dating and we're happy together, and if that pisses you off, then you can just fucking fight me!" Cartman blew up, before taking deep breaths to calm himself.

"Woah woah, wait... Dude, **I'm** gay too.." Craig said. Cartman blinked. He had forgotten Craig was gay.

"Sorry I forgot.." Cartman apologized.

"Are you okay?" Craig asked. Cartman sighed.

"I'm trying to control my anger..." Cartman said.

"You're doing a great job." Craig said, the usual dose of saracasm in his voice.

"Gee, thanks for the help." Cartman said, his eye twitcing. Craig snickered. Weird. A laugh of any kind from Craig was weird.

"And I'm not with Tweek," Craig said. "In case you're wondering."

"Really?" Cartman said. He took a seat on the bench beside Craig. "But I thought you two were..?"

"No, all fan-girl bullshit," Craig said, he was fidgeting, which was weird for the usually calm boy. He leant into Cartman, and whispered in his ear. "I'm with Clyde.."

"Clyde?" Cartman repeated, only for his mouth to be covered immediately by Craig's gloved hand.

"Shut up!" Craig ordered. "You can't tell anybody..." He said, taking his hand off of Cartman's mouth.

"Why not?" Cartman said. "You want to hide your relationship?"

"I don't," Craig said. "But I don't know if **Clyde** wants to go public just yet." Craig said.

"Oh I see..." Cartman said. "I won't tell, I promise."

"Thanks." Craig said, smiling. "You two go have fun, where are you going?"

"We're not really going on a date." Cartman said. "We are together though, but no it's not a date, we're going to help Kyle.."

"Help with what?" Craig asked.

"Kyle didn't really explain with what, but all I know is that it involves that bitch Wendy." Cartman said.

"Wendy?"

"Yeah," Cartman sighed. "Stan broke up with her for good, cuz he's with Kyle now, and now she's making Stan's life hell..." He said.

"What a bitch.." Craig said, hopping off of the bench. "Let's go!"

"What?"

"I'm gonna help too," Craig said. "Wendy needs to be put in her place!" He said.

"Fahn.." Cartman said. Craig passed Kenny, then a thought crossed Cartman's mind. "Uhh, Kinny?"

"What?" Kenny looked up.

"When we were uhh.." Cartman began. "Why did you threaten to go to Craig?" With that, Kenny and Craig blushed.

"Uhh I was joking.." Kenny said.

"Kinny it's okay," Cartman said, smiling. "I don't mind, you can tell me." Craig was hiding his face.

"Oh christ.." Craig said. "I'm sorry Cartman, I didn't know you guys were together when I..."

"You fucked Kinny didn't you?" Cartman asked.

"I'm so so sorry dude..." Craig pleaded forgiveness. "Kenny just came on to me..."

"Calm down Craig, you sound like a soap opera..." Cartman snickered. "When was it?"

"It was last month." Craig said. Cartman laughed.

"We **weren't** together then, but even if we were I wouldn't care." He said. Craig looked confused.

"Wait what?" Craig said. Kenny decided he'd explain their strange relationship to the confused boy. He cleared his throat.

"Cartman realized I was a little slutty when we got together, and he accepted it. He said I could sleep with anybody as long as I told him who and when." He said. "..and didn't give him STDs." Kenny added.

"So why Craig though?" Cartman asked. "No offense Craig, but you don't come off as sexy unless your hat is off.."

"Thank you?" Craig raised an eyebrow.

"Craig is amazing in bed." Kenny deadpanned. Craig choked on his own spit, coughing loudly. "Not to mention his cock is nice and long." He said, causing Craig to grow a shade of red resembling beet juice.

"Really?" Cartman studied Craig's cowering form. Who would have known? Beside Kenny and now Clyde apparently, nobody. "Craig chill out dude." Cartman said.

"Kenny..." Craig said, pointing to the blonde. "I'm never sleeping with you again!" He said. Kenny rolled his eyes, looking over at Cartman.

"He'll be crawling back soon, just wait.." Kenny said, shaking his behind at Craig, who gulped.

"Okay, we gotta get going now..." Cartman said, leading Kenny further down the sidewalk toward the school. Craig trailed behind, trying to not look Cartman in the eye. Said fat boy was looking him over every chance he got...

oOo

"They s-sure are taking their precious time." Butters said, kicking a stray rock into the bushes. They stood outside the school and had already taken down four of the total of 30 posters. Kyle was currently studying one of him holding Stan close, the two in a deep kiss. Kyle didn't like how his hair was drawn, it looked more like an afro than his jew curls. He hated his hair, but this was worse.

"This is weird..." Kyle said. "It's like the people who drew these never saw us before..."

"You should see the ones of me and Eric..." Butters cringed recalling the 'artwork'. Kyle raised an eyebrow.

"Cartman? You and Cartman?" Kyle almost laughed, but after seeing the embarrassment on Butters' face, he held back. "That would be a sight." Kyle heard footsteps approaching, and turned to see a familiar fat boy. "Speak of the devil..."

"Gahs Gahs we're here!" Cartman announced as he walked up with Kenny and... Craig?

"Why is Craig with you?" Kyle asked.

"It's okay, he's with us!" Cartman said. Kenny looked at Butters and smirked, causing the smaller blonde to blush slightly. Cartman smacked the back of Kenny's head. "Pay attention Kinny!"

"Help?" Kyle said, he suddenly grew angry. "You told him!?" Craig approached Kyle and put his hands on the jew's shoulders.

"I made him tell me, I wanna help," Craig said. "Now what did that bitch do?"

"She put up these all over the school." Kyle said, handing he stack of posters to Craig, who leafed through them.

"Dude, this is bullshit." Craig grew frustrated. "It's just like me and Tweek, and that was just a rumour." Craig said, causing Kyle to look over at him.

"Rumour?" Kyle said. "I thought you two were actually togther?" He asked.

"No," Craig said. "But I **am** gay though, just not with Tweek." He said. Kyle was confused.

"Are you in a relationship?" Kyle asked.

"Can we just focus on the task at hand?" Craig asked, growing tense.

"Oh okay, uhh... Butters and I will go do the cafeteria, Cartman and Kenny can do the gym, and I'll leave the halls to Craig, they'll be the easiest." Kyle said.

"How will we know when we got them all?" Cartman asked.

"Butters knows where they all are.." Kyle said.

"How does Butters know where they are?" Craig asked.

"Because I put them up..." Butters said, hanging his head down.

"Butters.." Kyle said.

"No I did it..." Butters sulked.

"Really?" Craig was confused.

"Yea.." Butters teared up. "I wanted to be with the girls, and-and she said she'd let me in if-if I did it and I'm so so s-sorry..." Butters cried, looking down as his tears streamed down his rosy cheeks.

"Butters..." Cartman said. He put his hands on Butters' head, and lifted the boy's gaze to look into his eyes. "Wendy tricked you, it's okay. We're gonna get her back. Okay Buttercup?" Cartman came up with the nickname on the spot.

"Okay..." Butters was still teary eyed. Cartman then pulled the small blonde into a hug. Butters basked in Cartman's warmth as his back was rubbed by two large hands.

"Don't you cry.." Cartman said. "It's okay, you were tricked by an evil bitch..." Butters looked up at Cartman.

"Let's get started." Butters said.

"Let's..." Craig agreed. The boys then split up to go to their respective spots, but before that, Cartman pulled Kyle aside.

"Don't ask Craig about relationships right now, he'll tell you on his own in due time.." He said. Kyle nodded in affirmation. Then the two separated.

Kyle walked with Butters though the main hallway and to the cafeteria. Suddenly a buzzing was heard. Butters pulled out his phone. He saw that it was phone call from Wendy Testaburger. He ignored it and followed Kyle into the cafeteria...

oOo

"Answer your fucking phone!" Wendy shouted. She redialed, only to be sent straight to voicemail. "Dammit!"

" _This is B-Butters Stoch, I'm not here right now, but leave me a message and I might just get back to you.. Ah geez, is that all I have to say? *sigh* lu lu lu I got some appples-_ BEEEEEP." Wendy sighed.

"Miss Squirrel, It's me Alice..." Alice was her codename. "Call me back as soon as you get this..." She ended the call, giving her pillow a good hard punch.

 _Dammit,_ she thought. _He's probably already telling Stan and Kyle her plan like the little snitch he is!_ She threw her blankets off, and marched to her closet, where she found a suitable outfit, black jeans and purple long sleeve top, and put it on.

Wendy stomped down the steps, and into the living room. She passed her parents who were watching the new. They began to barrage here with the typical 'good morning sweetheart' and the 'do you want breakfast?'. She ignored every sentence, and left through the front door.

She walked all the way to Butters' house. She knocked on the cold brown door three times, and awaited a response. Nothing. Aggravated, and suddenly blind to any and all feelings, she charged the door with amazing strength, breaking the cheap suburban-style door off of its hinges.

She got up, not even taking a second to admire her own strength, and stomped though the house and up to Butters' room. She flung the door open, and looked around. The room was empty.

"Where are you!?" She shouted angrily. She made no attempt to calm herself, instead taking her anger and using it to tear apart Butters' room. She destroyed Butters' toys and ruined his freshly-made bed. She stopped at Butters computer, which was open on facebook.

It showed a comment thread with a particular comment from a one **Stanly Marsh.** She read the comment, followed by the reply from Butters, and then she connected the dots.

"That son of a bitch!" She screamed. "He told them!" She then ran out of Butters' room leaving behind an incredible mess. She ran staight for Stan's house.

oOo

"Is that the last of them?" Kyle asked. Butters was in the process of counting all the posters the five boys had collected. Butters counted each one as they were tossed into a large metal drum.

"That's all of them!" Butters said, giving Craig the thumbs up. Craig held a box of matches, preparing to ignite the dastardly artwork.

"Stan back Kinny." Cartman said, stepping in front of the blonde. "You **aren't** dying today." He said, producing a fire blanket and draping it over Kenny.

"I love you Teddy." Kenny said, kissing Cartman on the cheek. Cartman let Kenny wrap his arms around him as they observed.

Craig nodded and struck a match, igniting it, and tossed it in the drum. The drawings burst into flames immediately. The flames cast an orange glow around the drum. All the boys obvserved thr fire. It was then that Butters decided to break the silence.

"So E-Eric?" He said.

"Yeah?" Eric said.

"Are you and Kenny together?" Butters asked. Cartman smiled.

"Yes we are..." Cartman said, taking Kenny's hands in his own. "What about you, find anybody yet?" He asked.

"No..." Butters said nonchalantly, but then going silent as he looked on at nothing in particular. He had an epiphany. "That's it isn't it?" He asked himself.

"What?" Craig was playing the part of the confused onlooker, for which he might've just earned an oscar.

"That's it..." Butters said, looking over at Cartman with a twinkle in his eye. "I'm gay!" He said.

"What are you talking about?" Kyle asked.

"First I thought I was bi-curious, then I thought I was trans, but it turns out I'm just gay!" Butters beamed. He smiled as he said this.

"That's awesome Butters!" Kyle said, glancing over at Cartman, still instinctively expecting a retort from the fat boy.

"Yeah that's cool!" Cartman agreed. "Maybe now you can get yourself a boyfriend." Cartman said. "If you want to test the waters a little, Kenny is willing to help you out, and I don't mind." He added with a smile.

"O-okay sure..." Butters blushed. Kenny peaked from behind Cartman and winked at the smaller blonde boy.

"If Kenny takes advantage of you I'll kill him..." Kyle deadpanned, eyeing Kenny and giving him the general 'I'm going to kill you' gesture. Kenny feigned a gasp and Cartman chuckled.

Out of nowhere, Kyle got a ping on his phone. It was from Wendy Testaburger.

 _Ike, do you know where your big brother is? I need to give him his notebook, he left it at school._ The text said. Kyle snickered. He typed.

 _You're talking to him._ He chuckled, imagining Wendy's face at that moment. Just then his phone rang, surprise surprise, it was Wendy. Kyle shrugged and declined the call. Craig approached him.

"Maybe now she'll fuck off..." Craig said, balling his hands into tight fists. "I swear if this doesn't work, I'm going to just kick her ass!" Craig growled.

"I don't think it'll come to that..." Kyle said. Then his phone rang again. He notice the caller ID was different, it wasn't Wendy this time...

...It was Stan...

"Hello?" Kyle said, doing his best to mimick Ike's baby talk. He was met with heavy breathing on the other line.

" _Ike? Ike get Kyle, please get- Argh!_ " It was Stan, and he sounded in pain.

"Stan!?" Kyle gasped.

"What's going on?" Craig asked.

"Stan what is it?!" Kyle asked. "It's me Kyle, are you okay?!" Kyle's heart was thumping as he awaited a response.

" _He's okay right now,"_ A maniacal voice said on the other end. Wendy? " _But he won't be for long..."_ She cackled.

"Wendy!" Kyle shouted. Kenny, Cartman and Butters were now drawn toward the phone conversation by the panic in Kyle's voice. "Wendy what did you do to Stan!?" The phone call ended. Kyle's heart was racing now. Craig was shaking Kyle's shoulder, begging to know what was going on.

"Dude what is it!?" He asked, panic in his voice. Craig could see the fear and anger in Kyle's emerald eyes.

"Wendy has Stan!" Kyle said. "We gotta go find Stan!" He shouted. Craig, Kenny, Cartman, and Butters didnt' have time to ask anymore questions, because they were soon running to keep up with Kyle...

...TO BE CONTINUED...

 _Author's note: Sorry for the cliffhanger, but that's just where this chapter ended up at. Chapter 9 is currently in the works as I upload this. As always, fav, follow, and review. Thank you for reading and love you all!_

 _-Leave a review on what you currently think about Wendy Testaburger! Me, I hate her, but that's obvious...-_


	9. Butters 20

_Author's note: Welcome back to South park! This chapter was the hardest for me to write so far. Hope you like it! There will be blood._

CRYBABIES_

 **Chapter 9: Butters 2.0.**

"Wendy has Stan!" Kyle said. "We gotta go find Stan!" Kyle shouted, running off in the direction of Stan's house. Cartman, Kenny, Butters, and Craig had no time to ask any further questions, because they were soon struggling to keep up with the jew.

"Whattya mean.. Wendy... has Stan?!" Cartman heaved as he ran beside Kenny, who was intentionally slowing his pace, as to not leave Cartman behind. Kyle ignored the question. He was scared shitless. What was she doing to him?

"Where are we going Broflovski?!" Crag demanded. Kyle snapped out of his trance.

"Stan's house, that was where he was this morning!" Kyle said, as the rounded a corner, and ran right to the house. Kyle went ahead and barged through the front door. The other four boys followed.

"I don't think he's here.." Kenny said through deep breaths. Cartman was on his hands and knees, completely exhausted.

"Stan!?" Kyle called out. No answer. Kyle pulled out his phone and called Stan. It rang on the other end for what seemed like forever.

" _Oh, Kyle, what a pleasant surprise..."_ It was Wendy. Kyle had to try with every fiber of his being not to scream at her.

"Wendy?" Kyle said, trying to remain calm. "Where is Stan?" He asked, his voice trembling as he spoke.

" _Stan? He's back with me!"_ She said. Kyle'e heart skipped a beat.

"Where are you?" He asked.

" _I said he's back with me! Now go butt-fuck somebody else's boyfriend!"_ She screamed. Kyle recoiled. Now he was angry.

"What are you doing to him!?" Kyle demanded. Wendy laughed on the other end.

" _I'm not doing anything..."_ Wendy said. Kyle knew that was a lie, it had to be.

" _Kyle help!"_ Kyle heard the familiar voice of Stan in the background. Wendy cursed at him to shut up and ended the call. Kyle shouted and fell to his hands and knees. Soon he was surrounded by four other concerned boys.

"Did you find out where he was?" Craig asked. Kyle looked up at him, tears streaming down his cheeks, contrasted with fiery eyes. Craig's question was immediately answered without Kyle even having to open his mouth.

"Craig..." Kyle said. "...We gott find out where she is, then you can kick her ass!" Kyle said. The red head rose to his feet, with Kenny helping him maintain balance.

"We're gonna find her Kyle." Kenny said.

"And we're gonna put her in her place..." Cartman said.

"Yeah, this is getting ridiculous." Kyle said. "She may be a girl, but she voided all mercy when she kidnapped Stan!" The five boys then left the house, beginning their hunt.

"Where do you think they are?" Craig asked.

"I dunno, but we should try Butters' house first." Kyle said. Butters looked over at Kyle, about to object, but he saw the intensity in Kyle's eyes, and he backed down. They hurried to Butters's house in the freezing morning.

oOo

"Wendy!" Stan called out. He was tied to a red chair in a dark room. He could still make out the color of the walls, they were a strang tint of blue. It almost reminded him of Craig's hat.

"Yes Stan?" Wendy peeped. She waltzed over to Stan, placing her hands on his bare chest. He was still naked, and shivered at her touch.

"Please..." Stan begged. "Let me go!"

"I can't do that Stan..." She said, trailing her fingers down Stan's chest. "You're my boyfriend and I can't let you go..."

"Wendy I broke up with you!" Stan said. "I am gay! I'm with Kyle now!" Stan shouted. Wendy then scraped her nails hard against Stan's flesh, drawing blood. Stan screamed in pain, flinching in his restraints.

"NO! YOU ARE WITH _**ME**_!" Wendy spat. She grabbed Stan's chin forcefully and kissed him. Stan kept his lips tight together, not letting her inside. She proceeded to pinch Stan's skin hard, causing Stan to yell out, allowing Wendy to invade his mouth with her tongue. Stan fought the invasion, attempting to bite her tongue. Wendy ended the kiss and delivered a hard smack to Stan's face.

"GODAMMIT BITCH I DON'T EVEN LIKE YOU!" Stan shouted, tears beginning to form in his eyes. Wendy glared down at him with fiery eyes. She was blind with anger now, as she stomped off to a bag she had lying on the floor.

Stan watched as she dug in the pink duffel bag. He gulped as he had a vague idea of what was about to happen. He'd seen too many movies, and he knew she had some kind of weapon in that bag. Stan began to cry. He knew this wasn't going to end. He knew he wasn't going to get out of here alive.

"I love you Kyle..." Stan whispered to himself. Thankfully Wendy didn't hear him as she pulled out her dad's hunting knife...

oOo

"What the hell?!" Kyle gasped upon seeing Butters' front door smashed in. Butters put a hand over his mouth and began to ramble on about how grounded he was going to be when his parents got home.

"Did you get robbed?" Cartman asked, mildly impressed that anybody in south park could knock a door off of its hinges like that.

"What happened here Butters?" Craig asked the blonde, who shook his head.

"I dunno..." Butters said, his voice trembling. They entered the house and saw the mess. It was strange. _It couldn't have been robbers_ , Kyle thought, as they proceeded up the stairs. Kyle took note that any and all damage seemed to follow a trail. Butters looked on in horror as he saw that the trail led to his room.

"Oh lord..." Butters gasped upon seening his room, which was a complete wreck. Posters were torn from the walls, toys were destroyed, and his bed was ruined. Butters quickly ran to the bed, and reached under it to pull out a small box. He let out a sigh of relief upon opening it. Nobody could see what was in the box, and Butters quickly closed it, and redialed the combination lock, before sliding it back under the bed.

"Did you piss off the mafia Butters?" Cartman joked. Butters looked at Cartman with wide eyes, not taking it as a joke. "I'm kidding Buttercup, but seriously what the fuck?" He said, looking around at the destruction.

"It was Wendy..." Butters mumbled in pure terror. The realization sent chills down his spine. If Wendy was crazy enough to kidnap Stan, just imagine what she'd do to him if she knew he ratted her out. Shit, she obviously already knew, and was currently on a manhunt. Kyle noticed Butters, first his comment then the boy himself, who was shaking at this point.

"Butters, it's going to be fine.." Kyle assured him as he got down to Butters' level and pet his cheek. "We're gonna go find Wendy and we're not gonna let her hurt anybody else..." He said.

Just then there was a quiet ringing. Butters' gaze dropped down to his right pocket, from which a ghostly vibration pierced the rather silent ringtone. Butters pulled his phone out with trembling hands, and gazed upon the screen. Kyle could see the reflection of the name in Butters' wide fearful eyes.

 _Wendy Testaburger..._

"Answer it," Kyle said. Butters glared at him with a 'are you stupid?' look. Kyle gave Butters his mother stare, and soon Butters was putting the phone up to his ear. Just before the call started, Kyle added "Say as I say...".

"Uhh... M-Miss Squirrel here..." Butters said nervously. Kyle and the other's held back a collective 'what the fuck?' as the small blonde continued. "No I was at the uh..." He looked over at Kyle for help. Kyle mouthed to him, _shopping with your parents!_ "I was grocery shopping with my mom and dad..." He said. Kyle gave him a thumbs up.

"N-no I haven't even gotten home yet..." He said. Butters looked over at Kyle.

" _Have you seen Kyle today?"_ Wendy asked. Butters looked over at Kyle, mouthing the question he was just asked. Kyle nodded his head, and mouthed, _I saw him at the store with his mom..._ "Y-yeah..."

" _Where?"_

"A-at the same store, with his mom..." Butters said, mocking confusion, and doing a good job. "I-is everything alright?" Butters asked for good measure.

" _I thought you ratted me out, I'm sorry..."_ Wendy said, obviously trying her best to sound apologetic, and failing. But Butters played along.

"Do you need a hug?" He asked. Kyle raised an eyebrow. Hug? They were going to kick her ass and Butters wanted to hug her? Then Kyle remembered Butters was acting. He fooled him.

" _Y'know what? That'd be nice Butters..."_

"Okay, where are you?" Butters asked. Kyle's face lit up. This was easier than he thought. Butters sat and listened for a minute. His eyes went wide and he looked over at Craig. Craig returned the look with his usual glare, before becoming confused. "O-okey dokey, I'll be there in a jiffy, we're pulling up now..." Butters lied.

" _Okay, by the way, I heard there were some robbers in town, so be careful."_ Wendy lied through her teeth.

"Okay thanks.." Butters' eye twitched as he hung up. He sighed and looked at the other boys. "She's at Craig's house..." Butters revealed.

"Why **my** house?" Craig asked.

"Probably cuz you're not in it," Cartman said, being a general smartass. "Are your parents home?" He asked.

"No, they're with Stan's parents in Denver still..." Craig said.

"Well then that's why..." Kyle said. "Okay, so she wants you to go see her?" Kyle asked Butters, who nodded.

"Yup." Butters said.

"Forget it." Cartman said. "We're not letting you go in there alone. We have no idea what's she's capable of..."

"She's just a girl dude." Craig said.

"She kidnapped Stan and knocked a door off of its hinges, The bitch isn't human!" Cartman rebutted. "I'm not putting Butters in danger!" Cartman said, taking Kyle's place as the protective one.

"Well if we all show up at once, then she might just snap and kill Stan!" Craig added. Kyle gasped.

"Don't say that dude!" Kyle said.

"Well we gotta think about this logically!" Craig said. "The bitch has lost it! We need somebody to distract her so we can get Stan out of there, then we can kick her ass!" he said.

"I'll do it..." A meek voice added from behind Cartman. Everybody turned to Kenny, who was silent up until this point.

"No Kinny!" Cartman barked. "I'm not putting you in danger either!" He said, taking hold of the blonde's hand.

"Well who else can do it?" Kenny said. "She's expecting Butters, you can cut my hair to make me look like Butters!" Kenny explained. Cartman wasn't having it.

"But she might kill you Kinny!" Cartman said, and tears began to form in his eyes.

"You know, I'll come back..." Kenny said, kissing Cartman on the lips. "I promise I'll come back." He said.

"You fuckin better..." Cartman said, hugging Kenny tight. Kenny squeezed Cartman as he planted kisses on his large cheek.

"Thank you Kenny..." Butters said.

"You gotta promise me something Sweety..." Kenny said, pointing over to Butters.

"Yeah?" Butters asked. He grew a little red at being called 'sweety'.

"Stay a virgin for just a little while longer." Kenny winked. Butters blushed further.

"Okay, now let the transformation begin." Craig said. "Kyle, go get Kenny's jacket!" He ran for Butters' bathroom and came back with a hair-cutting kit and a folding chair.

"Where is it?" Kyle asked.

"At mah house, It should be on my bed." Cartman said. Kyle nodded and was off in a flash. Kenny sat down in the chair and awaited his makeover with a smile...

oOo

"So you're gay?" Bebe asked a rather flustered Clyde. He was red from being inquired about his sex life by the girl who literally asked to blow him a few days ago. They were seated in the cofee shop, the same one Wendy stormed out of a day prior.

"No I'm bi..." Clyde elaborated. The blonde girl nodded.

"So there's a chance..?" She asked, fluttering her lashes at him.

"In your dreams." Clyde said. "I need to talk to you about Wendy..." He said.

"What about her?" Bebe was officially not Wendy's friend anymore. Being called a bitch was kind of the last straw.

"I heard she broke up with Stan again.." Clyde.

"No no no, Stan broke up with her," She clarified. "and she got all bent out of shape about it, like the posessive bitch she is..." Bebe snarled.

"Why did Stan break up with her?" Clyde asked. Stan was known for being the shy type, and not one for confrontations.

"He didn't like Wendy anymore and got tired of her shit, rightfully so..." Bebe said. "Oh, and Stan is also gay." Bebe added.

"Really?" Clyde smiled. He was glad to hear that he wasn't the only one who was discovering his sexuality in South Park. "Do you know if he's in a relationship?" Clyde asked.

"Wendy had a theory that he was with Kyle, and to be honest it would make sense, but I'd be dead when I believe one of her fucked theories..." Bebe droned. She suddenly found her straw very interesting. "So are **you** in a relationship?"

"No..." Clyde said automatically. "I mean... I dunno... I-I think..." Clyde stuttered as he spoke, part of him not sure if what he had with Craig was a relationship. The other part of him was questioning whether or not he could trust Bebe with this information.

"You... _think_?" She raised an eyebrow. Clyde sighed as he continued.

"Promise not to do that girl thing?" Clyde asked.

"Girl thing?" She pondered.

"Y'know, when you say you won't tell anybody but end up telling everybody you know anyway..." Clyde explained. Bebe should've been offended, but she was known for being terrible at keeping her mouth shut.

"Well, if it makes you feel better, I never told anybody that I asked to suck you off." She said flirtatiously, licking her straw with the delicate action similar to that of... well you know.

"So you won't tell anybody?"

"For christ's sake, just say it.." She smirked at Clyde's nervousness. She didn't know who he was with, but Clyde must've really loved him, if he was that nervous to explain himself.

"Craig Tucker..." Every ounce of adoration left Bebe's face. She gave Clyde a sour look.

"You chose Craig over me?" She asked, feeling offended.

"He's funny and handsome..." Clyde listed. "Not to mention he's _very_ romantic, more than you'd think..." Clyde explained. Bebe slowly nodded.

"He's got a big dick doesn't he?" She asked bluntly, causing Clyde to choke on his cappucino. He coughed into a napkin as he recovered from the initial shock of being asked such a vulgar and upfront question. Bebe laughed. "It's okay you don't have to tell me, I'm just glad you're happy!" Bebe said, getting up from her seat and walking over to the recently revitalized Clyde, and giving him a friendly peck on the forehead.

"Thanks for understanding Bebe..." Clyde said, smiling. He wiped his mouth of the coffee and disposed of his napkin.

"No problem, see you Monday!" Bebe said, leaving Clyde to his devices. He proceeded to clean his mess of regurgitated coffee, not allowing anybody to help him. Once he had cleaned the table completely, he headed out of the coffee shop and into South park. He needed to find Craig and tell him the news...

oOo

"How do I look?" Kenny asked the group. Kyle had on a look of disbelief, Cartman, one of confusion, and Butters had on a few extra shades of red, and Kenny's parka.

"D-did you have to get me a dirty jacket?" Butters asked.

"Butters, I'm poor, all my stuff is dirty..." Kenny said. Butters nodded and apologized.

"Jesus, you look almost just like him..." Kyle said. He then approached Butters and pulled up the hood on the parka, and pulling the strings tight just like Kenny did. After that Kyle could no longer tell who was who.

"And you look just like Kenny..." Kyle said. Cartman gasped. Who knew all he had to do was give Kenny one terrible haircut, throw him in some Turqoise, and boom, you got Butters 2.0.

"Craig, you are a genius..." Cartman said, putting a hand on the black-haired boy's shoulder. Craig put his hand atop Cartman's, which made the larger boy jump.

"I have my moments..." Craig said, giving Cartman a wink. Cartman gulped. He wasn't expecting that. What made Craig such a flirt all of the sudden? "Sorry, Kenny must be rubbing off on me..." Craig said, facepalming himself.

"When you cut somebody's hair, you get to know alot about 'em." Cartman chuckled. The boys then got down to business.

"Okay, let's get going..." Kyle said. The four other's obeyed like loyal soldiers, following Kyle out of Butters' house, as they marched on to the Tucker residence.

Once Craig's house was in sight, Kyle and the others devised a plan.

"Kenny, you'll go in, and us four will sneak in through Craig's basement." Kyle explained. "You'll have to lead Wendy as far from wherever she's holding Stan as possible." Kyle said.

"She's using my room..." Craig said. Kyle looked over at him.

"How do you know?"

"It's the only room. Besides the kitchen and bathroom, every room in the house is locked," Craig explained. "And I keep the front door unlocked for Clyde..." Craig added.

"Huh?" Kyle huffed. "Why Clyde?" He asked. Craig looked immediately frazzled.

"Uh n-no reason.." Craig stuttered.

"Why is _Craig Tucker_ nervous?" Kyle said, stepping back he was so shocked. "What's the matter?"

"Clyde's his new boyfriend." Kenny said. Craig charged the blonde, but Kenny held up his hands in surrender. "If I die, who's gonna run distraction!?" Kenny asked with a smile.

"Fuck you McCormick!" Craig snarled. "Yes, I'm seeing Clyde, but don't tell anybody, please!" He begged.

"Why?" Kyle was confused. "I figured you'd want to be open about that?"

"Yeah, but Clyde isn't..." Craig said. "He's just discovering he's bi, and I don't want to make being with me a burden for him..." Craig said.

"It's okay I won't tell..." Kyle said. "Now on with the task at hand..." Kyle said.

They sat and discussed the plan further in depth. At the end of the briefing, Butters pulled Kenny aside. He kissed the taller blonde passionatley. Kenny let out a confused moan at the sudden kiss. He melted into it though. As soon as he was putty, Butters ended the kiss.

"Thank you Kenny," Butters said. "I promise I'll wait for you, that's if Eric's okay with it..." Butters looked over to the larger boy, who nodded and smiled.

"I promise I'll be back Teddy..." Kenny said. Cartman just sighed.

"I know..." He said, hanging his head down.

"Let's get this show on the road..." Craig said. He looked over to Cartman, and gave him a weak smile. They were all internally terrified. They had no idea what Wendy was capable of at this point...

Kenny walked up the front door. He gave three attentive knocks to it. He turned back to the other four and gave a thumbs up. Then the door opened. Wendy stood at the door and smiled at Kenny. Kenny knew she fell for it when she began to speak.

"Hey Miss Squirrel.." Wendy said. Kenny had no idea who Miss Squirrel was supposed to be, but he just played along. "Okay Butters I'm sorry for the nickname..." Wendy said.

"I-its okay..." Kenny said, immitating Butters almost to a point. He had Wendy fooled.

"No, no it's not..." Wendy said, she took Kenny's shoulder, and led him out into the yard. Kenny looked at her with the best Butters eyes he could pull off. They walked over to the right side of the house. Kenny looked over at a small door to the basement, where Wendy was now standing in front of.

"Shit..." Craig hissed. Kyle looked over at him and asked what was wrong. "She's standing right in front of the door to the basement." He said.

"How are we going to get Stan then?" Cartman asked, annoyed.

"We're just gonna have to wait and see if they move out of the way..." Craig said. Kyle didn't like the thought of that. He got a sick feeling in his stomach when he thought of leaving Kenny with Wendy any longer than needed.

"Butters..." Wendy said, staring out into the sky. Kenny stayed attentive. Wendy nodded at him "Aren't the clouds beautiful today?" She asked. Kenny, in keeping up with the Butters facade, gazed at the white clouds.

"Yu-huh..." Kenny said. Wendy let go of Kenny's shoulder. "They kin-kinda look like bunny rabbits.." Kenny said, duplicating Butters' stutter.

"Hey, you're right, I can see it!" Wendy said cheerfully. Her voice came from behind him.

"What's she doing?" Kyle asked himself. The four boys studied Wendy's moves. She was moving slowly now, almost stealthily.

"Butters..." Wendy said. Kenny could hear that she was closer.

"Y-yeah?" Kenny answered

"I'm sorry..." Wendy said. Before Kenny could shoot back with a Butters-esque reply, he felt a sharp pain in his throat. He looked down to see his blue sweater stained red. He grew dizzy as he bled from his throat. He could see Wendy's bloody knife as he fell onto the freezing snow. He let out one gargled breath as he died...

"HOLY SHIT!" Kyle screamed. Craig stood in utter shock. Cartman teared up immediately. Kyle looked over and in one second, the fat boy was gone. He was charging Wendy Testaburger with a discarded two by four.

"DIE BITCH!" Cartman barked as he charged at full speed.

"CARTMAN NO!" Kyle shouted.

...To Be Continued...

 _Author's note: I'm making a habbit of TBCs, I know... Sorry, I've just been busy with end of course bs. I promise the next chapter will be up as soon as possible!_

 _Please fav and follow. Thank you so much to everybody who already has. I would love a review of how things are so far. I would appreciate any and all feedback. Love you all!_


	10. Crybaby

_Author's note: Headin on down to South Park again! Exams are actual witchcraft I swear. Anyway, back to the show._

 _Side note: I've noticed that this story has taken a drastic turn, it went from a carefree romatic comedy to straight up thriller... For that I apologize. This is just what happens when you write as you go I guess._

CRYBABIES

 **Chapter 10: Crybaby...**

"DIE BITCH!" Cartman barked, as he ran at Wendy Testaburger with a two by four. Kyle chased after Cartman in an attempt to stop him, his feet seeming heavy in the snow.

"CARTMAN NO!" Kyle shouted. He feared for what Wendy would do to his friend. He knew Kenny would be back, but if Cartman died, what would Kenny have to come back to?

"Cartman?" Wendy's eyes gaped as the fat boy barreled toward her. She snapped out of her confusion just before Cartman got too close, stepping out of the way. Cartman swung the two by four at the air, missing. What shocked her was how srong that swing was, how fast and... vengeful it was.

"AH'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!" Cartman screamed, regaining his posture and going in for another strike. Wendy easily dodged it, but not without it catching her flowing scarf. Cartman stood his ground, clenching the two by four tightly as he began to cry. "Why?"

"Why did the hell did you kill him!?" Kyle demanded. Wendy chuckled. She swiped a lock of hair from her forehead.

"Because he ratted me out, and ruined EVERYTHING!" Wendy screamed. She swung her knife around violently.

"You were gonna kill me?!" Butters shouted. Wendy looked over at the small trembling blonde, then at the other one who laid dead on the front lawn. "That was Kenny, you killed Kenny!"

"Oh really?" Wendy chuckled. "I guess then it's not that big a deal huh?" She joked. Cartman's facial expression intensified. He grit his teeth as he squeezed his weapon tighter.

"Now you fucking die!" Cartman growled. Kyle watched, frozen in fear, as Cartman came at Wendy swinging. She moved aside and swung out with her knife, slicing Cartman's hand. He cursed and dropped the two by four. Wendy tackled Cartman, knocking the air out of him. She pinned him by his fat arms and spat in his face. She laughed.

"No..." Wendy said, as her face lit up with a look of pure evil. " _You_ die!" She shouted. Kyle stepped forward to stop her, but before he could advance, Wendy was whacked in the back of the head by a familiar two by four. She fell onto the snow, red trailing from her skull. Kyle looked over to see Craig wielding the two by four, panting heavily, with a look of utter fear in his normally placid eyes.

"She's..." Kyle couldn't finish. A terrible thought then came to mind. He took off running into the house. Craig stood frozen, dropping the wood to the ground as he shook. Cartman, sensing Craig's distress, got on his feet and approached the shaking boy, and placed his large hands on his shoulders.

"It's okay Craig.." Cartman said, hugging Craig like a small child, causing the boy to flinch. Craig let out shaky breaths in Cartman's embrace. "It's okay... She was gonna kill us, you did the right thing..." He comforted the normally stoic Craig Tucker. Craig calmed down, holding Cartman's wrists.

"It's over..." Craig said. Cartman nodded. Now they needed to get Stan and get out of there.

"Oh no..." Cartman heard Craig gasp. Cartman looked at the doorway to see Kyle, tearful and covered in blood. The blood belonged to the lifeless body in his arms...

...The body of Stan Marsh...

oOo

After the grisly discovery of Stan's body, Clyde arrived, and immediately called the police. Help arrived shortly after and Kenny, Wendy and Stan's bodies were taken to the morgue. Kyle went catatonic, along with an equally shell-shocked Craig Tucker. They were both seated in the clinic waiting room, awaiting Cartman as he was getting patched up. Butters spent the entire time trying to get a rouse out of the boys, stooping to punching himself in the face and calling himself the most obscene things to get anything out of the two. In the end, he just cried.

"Butters..." Cartman found Butters crying, with his hand wrapped around Kyle's. He sat beside the blonde and began to calm him. "They're gonna be okay, they just need time..." Cartman explained.

"Time won't do shit..." Kyle grumbled.

"What Kahl?" Cartman said.

"I said time won't do shit!" Kyle shouted. He smacked Butters' hand off of his own. Butters began to cry again. Cartman got out of his chair as Kyle exited his own. The jew boy began to stomp off.

"Why did you do that for?" Cartman calmly asked. Kyle spun around and charged at Cartman. He grabbed the fat boy's collar.

"Stan is FUCKING _DEAD!"_ Kyle shouted at the other boy. "He's not Kenny, he's not coming back, and that BITCH killed him!" Kyle screamed. He shoved Cartman as hard as he could, sending the fat boy into a folding chair, causing him to fall on top of it. He roared out in pain, as he continued to maintain his calm. He looked up at Kyle with wet eyes.

"Kahl..." Cartman said. "I'm sorry Kahl..."

"No!" Kyle cried out. "Fuck...you...fatass!" Kyle began to cry as he stormed out of the clinic. Butters clung to Cartman and began to cry harder. Cartman bit his lip and looked down at his hands. He had no idea how Kyle felt. He'd never lost anybody...

"Butters..." Cartman said, petting the blonde boy's head. "I need to get up..." He stated. The smaller boy obliged, getting up and letting Cartman walk off. Butters looked on as Cartman left. The blonde rubbed his knuckles together and cried to himself for a moment.

"Butters..." Butters felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked to see Craig. He had tears in his eyes. "Clyde's getting interviewed by the police, when he's done we'll go to his house.." He added.

"please hold me..." Butters whimpered before hugging Craig tight. The two sat wrapped in each other until Clyde arrived, taking the two silent boys to his place.

Kyle approached his house in the dead of night, he had walked from the clinic by himself. He was offered a ride by Officer Barbrady and other friendly South Parkians, but he ignored them as if he was blind and deaf. He was angry. He was also sad, devastated. Wendy Testaburger took away what meant the most from him, and took everything from Stan. He decided to climb into his bedroom window as opposed to using the front door. He refused to interact with any people.

He immediately locked his door and put headphones on. If there was a house fire, he'd gladly perish in the flames listening to MCR. Kyle fell onto his bed and the tears began again. He cried into his pillow, as the Black Parade rang in his ears. He was empty now. His entire world had been destroyed. Cartman was sure to hate him now, and just seeing that look on Butters' face, and knowing that _he_ caused it...

...Kyle wanted to die...

There was a knock, and Kyle only knew this because he felt it. Somebody was really trying to get his attention. He put a pillow over his head and tried to ignore it. Alas, the knocking got louder and more forceful. He hurled his pillow at the door.

"FUCK OFF!" He screamed. Kyle let out a loud sob and threw his face back into his pillow. He heard the knock again, and instead threw his ipod at the door, causing it to shatter into pieces with a loud 'thump!'.

"Kyle..." A voice said. Kyle recognized the voice. He shook his head at the thought. He instead answered.

"I said fuck off I don't want to talk to anybody!" Kyle cried. There was a moment of awkward silence.

"Can I at least get my essay?" The voice said. Kyle nearly died right there. That voice sounded alot like...

"Stan?" Kyle called out. He was answered with silence. Annoyed yet hopeful, Kyle got out of bed and walked to his door, unlocking it. He was greeted with a sight that nearly made him pinch himself. There stood Stan, alive and well!

"Kyle!" Stan shouted, as he hugged the Jew with all he had. Kyle hugged back, though slightly shooken up. Stan then kissed Kyle, and was kissed back for good measure to make sure he wasn't hallucinating.

"Stan...?" Kyle said, licking his own lips in an effort to discern the taste of his boyfriend. "But how?" He asked.

"You'll never guess." Stan said, looking behind him, where Kyle could barely see a boy in a red jacket with brown hair descending the staircase.

"Cartman?" Kyle gasped. He connected the dots. "Oh my God!" He ran out, past Stan, and nearly tackled Cartman.

"Woah woah Jew!" Cartman exclaimed upon being hugged by Kyle.

"What did you do?!" Kyle demanded an explanation. Cartman went silent, continuing his descent. Kyle grabbed his shoulder and shook it. "What did you do dammit!?" He repeated.

"Kinny offered to exchange his life for Stan's..." Cartman said. "I said yes..." He began to cry. Kyle hugged him.

"No Cartman no..." He said. "That means Kenny won't...?"

"No..." Cartman said, between stuttered breaths. "no... he can't come back.. ever again.." He said.

"Cartman you can't do this..." He said, and upon seeing Cartman sigh, he added, "I won't let you do this!" Kyle said, gripping Cartman's jacket.

"Don't be a crybaby..." Cartman ironically taunted. He wiped Kyle's tears away along with his own. "I'll be fine..." Cartman said.

"But you love Kenny..." Kyle said. "I can't have you lose your love too..."

"I have Butters..." Cartman said. Kyle shot him a confused glare.

"Huh?"

"Kinny and I had a very polygamous relationship, to tell you the truth..." Cartman explained. "I love Kinny, but I also love Butters, Craig, and.. you..." He said, stroking Kyle's cheek. The jew boy blushed at this. He just took it as a compliment, and hugged Cartman. He hugged him tighter than ever before.

"Thank you Cartman..." Kyle said. "Sorry for calling you fatass again..." He added. Cartman shrugged.

"It's fahn." Cartman said. "Now hows about you and Stan get to work on that 'essay'?" Cartman said, winking. Kyle blushed again.

"Sure..." Kyle said. He began to walk back to his room, when he turned to Cartman. "Wanna join?" He asked. Cartman, looking rather shocked, simply nodded. Kyle gestured him to follow and they were soon in the room, with Kyle locking the door behind him...

 _Author's note: THE END(?) Thinking about starting up a new (less intense) love story. Going back to basics, if you will. Lemme know if you'd like to see a true conclusion to Crybabies (wink wink)._

 _Big thanks to all who have favorited and followed this story. I would appreciate any reviews or criticisms. Love you all!_


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